The end of a relationship can make you feel like you're out of control. Even if you're the one to initiate it, ending a relationship means that a lot of things in your life can change. You might make the decision to end the relationship, but a lot of other changes can come along with it that you don't necessarily want to plan for.
You can take control at the end of a relationship, whether you initiate it, your partner does, or it's a mutual breakup. By taking a proactive and pragmatic approach, you can plan to come out stronger. That doesn't mean you have to shut away your feelings or pretend it's not affecting you. In fact, it can make it easier to face your emotions, as well as some of the practical changes. Here's how you can be proactive when your relationship is ending.
Make a Plan
You can feel pretty unmoored when your relationship ends. You're used to your life being a certain way and now it's going to change. The first thing you can do to try and get control and minimize the impact of your breakup is make a plan. There are several things you might need to plan to help yourself prepare. If you're leaving together, what happens next? Is one of you moving out and if so, who? If you're moving out, where will you go? If your ex is moving out, how will you cover the bills? Thinking about practical issues like this will help you to get ready.
Book Some Therapy Sessions
Even if you're taking a practical and proactive approach to handling a breakup or divorce, you don't have to ignore your feelings. Pushing away your emotions isn't going to help you in the long run and it will most likely all come back to bite you eventually. If you want to be really proactive, consider booking some therapy sessions to help you process everything. It will give you space to talk about how you're feeling and what to do next. You might even find that seeing a therapist is useful for other things too and decide to continue.
Get Your Legal Ducks in a Row
The end of a relationship can mean dealing with legal matters, even if you're not married. If you are married, you might need to start looking for a divorce attorney to help you with the process. Not every divorce requires lawyers, but they are definitely helpful if you and your spouse can't agree on the terms of the divorce. If you're not married, you could still have legal issues surrounding child custody, shared property, or other matters that come with entangling your life with someone else's.
Create a New Routine
One of the most noticeable things about the end of a relationship is how your routine changes. Suddenly, someone who has been in your life is no longer there. Many things can change, from where you live to what your bedtime routine is like. Creating a new routine for yourself can help you to get back into the swing of things if you feel like you've been thrown off-kilter. You might need to find new ways to fill your evenings or build a routine that works better for you as a single person.
Spend Time with Yourself
Learning to be alone again can be tough if you've been in a relationship for a long time or you're a serial monogamist. Some people aren't used to being single and can struggle to be on their own. But instead of jumping straight into another relationship, it's a good idea to spend time with yourself. When you have some alone time or even allow yourself to be with friends and family more instead of looking for a new relationship, you can learn new things about yourself. You can get comfortable with being single so, even if you want a new relationship, you don't feel like you need one.
Learn from Your Mistakes
The end of a relationship can give you the chance to look forward to a better future. One of the things you can do is try to learn from your past mistakes before you start a new relationship. What were the things that went wrong? What did you always regret or wish was different? Avoiding the same mistakes could help you to find a relationship that's better than your last one.
It can take time to process the end of a relationship, but taking action as soon as you can is a good way to come out of it a stronger person.
Relationships, whether with a long-term partner or casual hook-ups, can take a lot of work, and a lot of it can be about trial and error. Opening up for more intimacy could mean trying things you’ve never done, pushing yourself out of your comfort zone, or making extra effort for the people you care about in order to help relationships succeed.
If you think your potential for intimacy is lacking, whether because you have limited experience or because you currently have a partner who has flagged up the issue, the following ideas can help.
What is Intimacy?
The most obvious example of intimacy is sexual, in which you open yourself up to more physical touch and physical closeness. Nevertheless, intimacy can also be about general closeness with another person through time spent together, as well as emotional intimacy where you learn more about another person or reveal more personal details about yourself.
All levels of intimacy are important for a successful and loving relationship, but not everyone finds intimacy easy to give or receive.
How to Open Yourself Up to More Intimacy
Decide What Intimacy Means to You
In the same way that people have different love languages, the way in which you show intimacy could be different from others. You may find it very intimate to hold hands, and that might be a big step for you, whereas other people might take that for granted. Spending time to get to know your own intimacy levels will help you to communicate better with your current partner or any future partners if you’re looking to start dating.
Schedule Moments of Intimacy
This may sound less than exciting if you have to schedule sex or closeness with your partner, but if you’re finding that intimacy is lacking because of busy schedules, making an appointment to stick to may be the only way to reconnect. If you can set aside a day or an evening in your busy schedules to devote to intimacy, this can help you to reconnect. Often, if you’re relying on times when you’re both not busy or not tired, it can become neglected and continually get pushed back.
Try to Experiment with Different People
You can learn a lot about yourself, what you like and what you don’t like by being intimate with different people, so if you’re single and looking to start dating or connect with more people, experimenting can be a good idea. You may want to try casual dating to test your feelings regarding intimacy, or maybe you want to try a professional escort service such as Playgirls London to put yourself in a dating situation and try connecting with someone on a deeper level.
Take it One Step at a Time
Intimacy can be very overwhelming if you’re not used to being vulnerable and if you try to do too much at once. Taking small steps could include having a deeper conversation, trying to spend longer touching, letting yourself be vulnerable more and more, over a course of time or anything else you’d like to work on that you can take at your own pace.
Every couple goes through ups and downs as these are a part of life. It does not matter how many years they have been in a relationship. It is how perfectly they have been taking care of their partnership. They can have some inspiring secrets to show you the way to stick together as you come of age. Take lessons from these happily-aging couples and try to find your way to a stronger bond. Here are the best secrets of happily-aging couples for an enduring relationship.
They embrace changes happily
In reality, a successful marriage is one in which both the partners respect each other and embrace the changes happily. These could be physical, financial, or emotional changes. They take time to learn and understand each other’s goals, plans and dreams for a better tomorrow. Respect and mutual understanding between mature partners are the two main pillars that bind them together in a lasting bond.
They fight fairly
Who does not fight in a relationship? Happy couples also have a fair share of fights and arguments. But the ego does not have a place in a strong relationship. Happy aging couples settle everything calmly and do not let anything affect their bond. True power is in discussing and knowing the differences between the two. So, it is important to let go of personal ego and focus on saving the relationship.
They find new ways to play
Getting stuck in the same boring routine may affect the relationship as it ages. Successful couples find ways to ignite excitement and love over the years. They experiment in bed to keep monotony at bay. Using a real whizzinator XXX is a great idea to spice up your bedroom life. Many happy couples rely on it to keep the spark alive. Just hit the right pleasure points and reduce the hard work!
They remain physically connected
Age is just a number when it comes to relationships. Staying connected physically enables partners to thrive over the years. They always find ways to kiss, hug, and touch to create intimacy in their bond. They are happy because they combat and face the emotional and physical challenges and still maintain a connection. In simple words, demonstrations of affection and love never go out of style.
They welcome the challenges of aging
A strong partnership is one where both partners accept the challenges of aging as they come. They know the vulnerability that comes with each passing year. But, they remain with each other and talk about health and the future. These mature partners are ready to face the future with courage and love. These qualities make a relationship more beautiful and rock-solid.
Love is not a matter of sheer luck. Much more goes into a strong partnership. Building it requires unconditional honesty, togetherness, and trust. Create a balance and try new things to keep the attraction growing over the years. You will not have to worry about drifting apart with these easy relationship secrets of happily aging couples who have been together forever.
If the fire has gone from your relationship, you may be worried that this means your relationship is coming to an end. Or, you may simply assume that this is a natural progression that starts to happen when we get older. However, it does not need to be this way. While a lot of couples can reach a point where the intimacy stops, there is often a valid reason for this. With that being said, we’re going to take a look at some of the different reasons why the intimacy may end in a relationship.
As you can see, there are a lot of different reasons why couples start to lose intimacy in their relationship. However, this does not mean that it is lost forever. The first place to start is by understanding why the intimacy stopped, to begin with. Once you understand this, you can then start to take the steps that are required to get the fire back into your life.
So many of our feelings and emotions are linked to our health; it’s incredible when you know how everything you are thinking of can have an actual, physical impact on your body – and vice versa. It makes sense, then, that your relationship status and how you feel about that can also determine how you feel when it comes to your health.
You can feel it happening. Love gives us a natural, physical reaction that includes a quickened heart rate, dilated pupils, ‘butterflies’ in the stomach, sweaty palms, and it can even make it hard to speak or find the right words to say.
Studies have shown that those in a committed, happy relationship tend to be healthier (and even live longer) than those who are single. Yet it’s not quite as simple as that. There are many things that go into how your love life affects your health.
If you’ve ever noticed that you put on a little (or perhaps a lot) of weight once you are in a stable relationship, there could be a good reason for it. Once you are happy with someone and comfortable with your body around them, many will stop trying quite so hard to keep fit, and the weight will start to gain. So, although putting on weight might be a sign of a happy relationship, it’s not good for your health.
If you find that you and your partner have become heavier since moving in together or marrying, for example, you can do something about it. Using that same partnership that allowed the weight to come in the first place, you can go out and exercise together, join the same gym, or even attend the same class. If you set weight loss goals as a couple, losing the weight should be easier than trying to do it separately.
Your Stress Levels
People who have sex regularly are a lot less stressed than those who don’t. That’s because sex reduces your blood pressure levels by increasing the level of serotonin (the happy hormone) and reducing the level of cortisol (the stress hormone) in your body. That gives you a good balance of the right kinds of hormones, and you’ll feel fantastic; you won’t feel stressed.
The more often you have sex, the better you’ll be able to react when it comes to stressful situations, and you’ll be a much calmer person in general. This is why being compatible in bed is actually more important than many people realize. If you feel that this is an issue, it might be time to shake things up. You can learn about Wild Flower’s pursuit of genderless toys leads to The Enby 2, and start a new exciting chapter in your sex life.
Getting the right amount of sleep each night is essential for your good health. Sleeping well for around seven to eight hours a night will help you to lose weight, make you more productive, lower your blood pressure, protect you from heart disease and heart attacks, reduce your chances of stroke and type II diabetes, and even stop some cancers from forming (although other factors will, of course, come into play here).
When you sleep next to someone you totally trust and really love, you will sleep better because you will be more relaxed. Of course, if your partner keeps stealing the covers or snores, then it might not be the most relaxing sleep you have ever had, but if this is the case, there are ways to fix the issues, such as using a tool that keeps the covers in place and wearing earplugs.
The first time you met your fiance, it was love at first sight. You knew this person was the one for you. But as years pass and life gets busy, it's easy to forget about that feeling of excitement when you think about spending time with them. It might seem like they don't understand what is important to you or that they are not invested in your relationship anymore. But, the truth is, sometimes relationships need work just like anything else does. So, here are tips on how to build healthy relationships with your fiance.
You can show your fiance appreciation in several ways. Consider these:
Invest in Trust
Trust is the glue that holds relationships together. Whether it's a romantic relationship, friendships or with your family - trust becomes the foundation of everything else you do in life and can make even difficult situations more manageable. But how does one build this necessary element?
The first step to building trust in any relationship is to have shared values. This includes having similar beliefs about marriage, children and money, taking care of each other, always being honest and understanding what each partner needs.
The second step is to establish a level of comfort, which you can do by taking small steps together, such as: creating an environment where you can express yourselves, learning how each other's triggers work and being open about personal struggles.
Communication is an integral part of any healthy relationship. There are many ways to communicate, and you should choose the method that best fits your personality or lifestyle. It needs to be a two-way conversation with active listening on both parties.
The goal in communication is not just sharing information but building mutual understanding, so try to avoid becoming defensive when discussing problems.
For love and commitment between couples to grow stronger over time, communication needs to remain open at all times—not just in good times but even more importantly, through struggles or difficulties.
Spend Quality Time Together
Spending time together is an essential ingredient for a healthy relationship. So take time to have fun together and not just when it's convenient or necessary. For example, try to schedule regular date nights, even if you can't make them every week.
Use your creativity! The point of dating is figuring out who someone is and seeing what they like outside of their comfortable environs. So get creative with new and exciting dates that allow you to learn more about each other.
One example that you won’t need to leave the house for is gaming. You can play online games together. This is just about finding a genre that you both enjoy whether that’s shooting games, racing or perhaps problem solving games. Right now, couples are having fun playing on Wordle together in friendly rivalries so there are countless options here.
In conclusion, building healthy relationships is about more than just following the steps above - it's also about finding what works best for each person to feel happy, safe and respected.
Every relationship stumbles at some point. Continue reading to learn 5 proactive ways you can help your relationship.
Believe it or not, there is no such thing as “the perfect relationship." So things can and will go wrong from time to time.
Fortunately, there are some things that you can do proactively to fix the situation so you don’t experience a full-blown breakdown. Let’s take a look, shall we?
Being “responsible” doesn’t mean having the weight of the world on your shoulders all the time. It just means being “responsive” - that is, putting a filter between your unconscious reaction to situations and what you actually say and do.
For example, let’s say that you’re a person in the habit of getting into shouting matches with your partner. It happens. But being responsible or responsive would mean avoiding any raised voices and just expressing yourself naturally. Ultimately, it’s about letting go of yourself a little and allowing things to develop more organically.
Create Some Space
When I was looking for a divorce attorney near me, the main motivation was surprising. People don’t split up because they want to get away from each other completely. That rarely happens. What they want is a little more space - the freedom to stretch their legs and enjoy themselves uninhibited. They want to preserve a part of themselves that’s outside of the relationship.
Creating space, therefore, is essential. Space isn’t the same as distance. But if you find yourself having the same conversations over and over, you might want to try spending some time apart, just enjoying other things in the world. You don’t have to be joined at the hip the whole time.
Take Time To Cool Off
You can sometimes get angry in a relationship, particularly when you feel like your partner isn’t meeting your needs in the way they should. Instead of getting confrontational and saying something you’ll regret, go and cool off somewhere.
Once you calm down, you can think about the situation more rationally. That way, you can consider the best needs of the partner while also finding a solution that works for you both.
Say Things More Gently
It’s not just what we say that matters, but also how we say it. You can have two conversations with identical content, but how they feel emotionally can differ tremendously. If you’re shouting at each other about your frustrations, it is going to create a different atmosphere compared to just talking about them.
Being gentle with your partner is the same as being kind to them. The people you love don’t want you to handle them aggressively. They want you to know them. And that means understanding how to deal with them delicately in a way that is appropriate for them.
Be More Value-Driven
Lastly, you might want to try being more value-driven in your relationship. Sometimes, you can feel let down by your partner if they aren’t being truthful. Talk to them about the things that matter to you, such as support, honesty, commitment and consideration. Find out how they relate to these ideas and which, if any, are important to them.
Relationships are not like in the movies, where everything falls into place perfectly. Continue reading to learn 4 important key points you need to have before you enter a serious relationship.
You might want one, you might crave one, you might feel all kinds of sad and bad for not being in one. However, if you’re not ready for a serious relationship, then you shouldn’t be willing to try and jump headfirst into one. You need to take the time to identify what it means to be and make sure you tick all boxes.
Don’t be on the rebound
If you’ve just been through a tough breakup, it might be tempting to try and fill the hole that someone else’s companionship, company, and affection used to be in. However, trying to pigeon someone into that hole is going to end disastrously. You need time to get okay with being alone again so that a partner can be a great support and addition, rather than a necessity. Take the time to build up your confidence again and be okay with being you. This doesn’t mean you can’t have some fun out there, but don’t go looking for the next big thing immediately.
You need to make sure that you’re not in a position to become entirely reliant on someone else right away. It’s an easy way to get stuck in a one-sided relationship in which abusive or co-dependent dynamics can easily form. If you don’t have a stable place to live, make that your first priority. If you’re not working, sign up and get verified for job boards. If you don’t have any friends, work on having them first. Don’t isolate yourself, leaving yourself vulnerable to those who might take advantage.
Make sure you have room for them
We all live increasingly atomised lives, meaning that a lot of us haven’t really gotten very good at making time for people in our community. If you find that a lot of your time is taken up by solo pursuits, you should look into starting hobbies that you can take part in with others and, in general, try to spend some more of your time with other people. A lot of people who spend most of their time alone can be surprised how annoying it can feel to have demands on their time and attention, even if that’s exactly what they asked for. You need to make room for others.
Be ready to change
A lot of people want a more serious relationship because they want the deeper intimacy and the connection that comes with it. However, we are formed by those relationships and if you’re ready and willing to change for the sake of it, it is not going to work out in the long-term Recognize your strengths and your weaknesses, come to terms with the difficulties you have and start working on them now.
Of course, there’s no real, formal checklist that determines whether or not you’re ready for a real relationship. But you should at least try to make sure you have your own ducks in a row before jumping into a long-term commitment with someone else.
Relationships take continued work. Keep reading to learn 3 tips that can help you keep the spark alive.
One of the biggest issues that relationships have is that one or both of the people involved stop working hard for the other person. We’re not talking about your career, but your relationship. Yes, relationships take work, and if you’re not willing to do this, then it’s going to fall apart. It can’t be sunshine and rainbows all the time, and on the days where it isn’t, you’re going to need to work a little bit harder. In this article, we’re going to be taking a look at some of the things that you should be doing, so keep reading if you would like to find out more.
Put In The Effort
The first thing that you should be doing is putting the effort in. There is nothing worse than receiving absolutely no effort from your partner, as it makes you feel unwanted. Feeling unwanted makes the other person doubt the relationship, and in serious cases can lead to divorce solicitors if you’re married. We know that you don’t want it to get to this point, so don’t let it. Do you remember those little things that you used to do at the start of the relationship? Keep doing them. Flirt with your partner. Write them little notes to open so that they know how much they mean to you. Take them on dates like you did when you were getting to know each other.
Nothing that we have mentioned is particularly difficult or even takes up that much time, so if you’re not doing them, why not? One of the most important things in a relationship is effort, and if nobody, or only one person is doing this, it is going to fall apart.
Keep The Trust Alive
The next thing that you are going to need to do is keep the trust alive. There is no way that you can continue to be in a relationship when there is no trust, either on one side or both. You cannot live your life wondering what your partner is doing behind your back as this is no way to live. You need to be able to trust each other, and know that no matter what, you are the one they want. If the trust is broken and you think it can be rebuilt, then do it. But, if it can’t, then know when to let go.
Talk To Each Other
Finally, communication is necessary to make any kind of relationship work, especially romantic ones. You need to talk about how you are feeling, and let your partner do the same without judgement or resentment. Everyone’s feelings are valid, and that’s what you’ve got to keep in mind, even if you disagree.
We hope that you have found this article helpful, and now see some of the things that you are going to need to do in order to work hard for your relationship. There is nothing worse than losing the one you love because you weren’t willing to do whatever it takes to make the relationship work, so you need to do whatever it takes. Hopefully this has helped, and you now know how to make the effort.
Here are 8 romantic gift ideas to surprise your other half with this year and for years to come.
A romantic surprise can renew your relationship, especially when it comes from the bottom of your heart. You may even fall in love all over again if you are at the receiving end of a big surprise. The good news is that surprises don't have to be expensive at all. But if you can afford them, there's nothing wrong with wowing your significant other with a priceless gift. If you want to reignite that spark in your love life, here are some sure-fire surprise ideas for your other half.
1. Remind them with a note that you care for them
If minimalism is your hallmark, go with something that's less costly yet meaningful. A simple creative gesture of love could take the form of a note to your partner, reminding them that they are always on your mind. Everyone wants to feel loved, isn’t it? You can renew the passion for your relationship by leaving an unexpected sweet note for your partner. It could be anywhere, say at the coffee table or maybe when you go for a date night. Fun surprises such as love notes can change the game of your relationship.
2. Write your partner a love letter
Putting your feelings for your partner on paper may sound old-fashioned, but believe it or not, handwritten love letters can constitute huge romantic surprises even in this digital age. According to Babita Spinell, a seasoned relationship expert, writing a love letter to your dearest one is a cool way to validate your affection for them. When a couple is experiencing rocky moments in their relationship, a love letter could also bridge the gap.
3. Take them out for a romantic trip
The coronavirus pandemic has impacted the world's tourism industry. However, if you want to still work on your couple goals, you could mask up and embark on a romantic trip. Since international travel restrictions may still be in force, you may want to opt for an outdoor adventure such as camping. Sweep your partner off their feet by planning a beautiful romantic trip with them. You may want to keep the trip as simple as possible; elaborate plans could fail in the midst of the pandemic.
4. Take your partner on a shopping spree
If your significant other has been talking about wanting new clothes, consider taking them out for shopping. Since shopping clothes for your partner when you don't know their sizes can be tricky, you may want them to go with you to the shop. Your girlfriend/boyfriend will probably see you as their best shopping assistant. Offer your feedback as they try new clothes, and your partner will likely find the best clothes.
5. Shower your partner with Valentine's Day flowers
With 2021 and Valentine's Day up in the air, you may want to surprise your other half with gifts such as flowers. It helps if you know which flowers are her favourite - whether tulips, sunflowers or roses. To stay safe from the virus and melt your partner's heart, you could order Fig & Bloom flowers for Valentine's Day. They can make bespoke floral arrangements that will pleasantly surprise our partner, and your thoughtfulness can help strengthen your relationship.
6. Offer them a full-body massage
You don't have to be a licensed massage therapist before you can calm down your partner with a soothing full-body massage. In these troubling times of the pandemic, it's easy for partners to stress out. A massage therapy can enhance your partner's life by reducing their stress, strengthening their immune system and improving blood circulation. Assuming you want to make the massage experience even greater for your other half, you could call in an expert therapist.
7. Buy them a ticket to a show
Is your partner a music lover, a sports fanatic, or a big fan of comedy? Buy them a ticket to their favorite show, and it will be nothing short of a big surprise. When festive seasons like New Year's Eve come around the corner, attending live events with your partner can be fun. Entertainment programs can also educate couples and help them realize their relationship goals.
8. Buy them beer and wine
If your boyfriend or girlfriend loves drinks that much, consider buying their favorite beer or wine. You may have to visit nearby breweries in your zone to have that wonderful couple time. For partners who may not want to step out, you could still order your beer and wine from home.
Romantic surprises have healing powers; incorporate them into your relationship and have a good time with your partner.
Dr. Laurie Betito Quotes