Sometimes I answer questions on various sites online as I find them.
I occasionally post the question (edited) as my Frank Advice answer here on my blog.
Names have been changed to protect privacy.
(As much privacy as one can expect posting a question online using their real names).
"I keep getting friend zoned by every girl I like, what should I do about it, what am I doing wrong?
How can you make your friends love you?"
Frank Advice Answer:
As the author of the book From Friends To Lovers, Stop Being Her Emotional Cookie Man I am telling you that basically you are friends ONLY (aka Friendzoned) because you address only SOME of the emotional needs of the other person, BUT not enough.
By addressing SOME of the emotional needs you become a person they “Like” and want as just a friend. (Sometimes they really want to be good friends and other times they might try to use you and take advantage of your feelings).
Take a break from the other person and make some changes in the way you communicate. Your goal is to learn what the emotional needs are and what you have been doing until now that violated them to the point that your friend is not attracted to you in that way.
Attraction is not a choice. When you address the emotional needs in the way the person needs them addressed in order to respond with attraction, then attraction happens.
You have to see what you were doing that did not attract your friend, so that you can change that behavior and start to attract them.
I hope this helps.
-Frank because I have to be
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There are many online dating sites available on the net like Tinder, InterracialDatingCentral and so on. However, a lot of people had tried online dating numerous times but with no such luck. Luckily that can be solved. The key is your online dating profile. Here is how you can take advantage of your profile at an online dating site.
It’s Starts With The Profile Picture
One of the first things you will need to do is pick a profile picture. Some online dating sites do not require a profile picture. However, this has a massive effect on how you will get noticed.
When choosing a profile picture, pick your most attractive picture but make sure it is still you. Do not use an overly photoshopped image of yourself. Moreover, do not use other people's images especially of those famous ones. Do not also use pictures of sceneries, animals or any non-human images.
By doing this, you are giving the impression that you are not good-looking. Be confident in what you look. Not everyone might notice, but there will always be people who will like you for not only your physical appearance but also the other traits you possess.
The Right Username Attracts The Right People
Another important thing to take into consideration is the username. Most of the online daters use their first name or nickname as their username. However, when attracting people to match with you, a name is sometimes not enough. That is why people use usernames that are very eye-catching.
However, when picking an outstanding username, be sure it gives off a pleasant impression. Do not go for nicknames like “Scarred”, “Fvckboi”, and so on. Usernames like these drive away people who you want to meet. So instead, use a username that describes your positive traits such as “FitNFun”, “HappyLife”, and so on.
Update Through Pictures
It is important to always update your profile on an online dating site. However, aside from the written details, you should also update your pictures. It is advisable to change your profile picture once in awhile but not often. At least every two weeks will do or it will depend on how many times you go online.
Another thing, you can show people what you have been up to by updating through uploading other images in your profile. You can upload pictures of yourself while playing basketball. You can also upload a photo of you while snuggling your pet cat. You can also upload images of you in all the places you have been too. This will not only give your viewers a good impression on you but it will also give them an idea of what they want to talk about with you.
The 7:3 Biography
On online dating profiles, the site will sometimes ask you to write a short bio. This is done in order for you to state some other information that the site had left out. Do not write some information that you already had supplied when you set up your profile like your nationality, age, location and such. And mind you, it is a short bio, so keep it short.
The best way to write your bio is to state some details about you and details of what kind of person you are looking for. The best biography has a ratio of 7:3. 70 percent of your bio should be about you and only 30 percent is about the person you are looking for. Do not indulge too much in describing the person you wish to online date. Viewers will get an impression that you have high standards.
With these tips, you can take advantage of your online dating profile to find the right match for you. Keep in mind that the best thing you can do is to be honest with yourself even online. Online dating is not a medium for you to switch identity. Remember that your profile serves as your virtual face and self. This is where people will judge you whether you are what they are looking for.
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