Testimonial: To summarize my experience in doing Frank’s 2 hrs per week/ten week coaching program I would say the following: Most coaches give you a game-plan for the night, Frank gives you a game plan for life. A big thanks for the work that we did - I found the course to be an absolutely fantastic investment of time, money and effort. It'll be with me for life. Also looking back it also made me think of all of the work you must have put in over many years to acquire this much understanding and course material. It's incredible. I'll certainly be e-mailing you in the future to let you know how things are going whether or not we need to do any more coaching.
I’ve studied pick up and relationship material for a few years and applied it, but very quickly I reached a plateau. Sure I learned how to pick up girls better than before but that brings in as many problems as it solves. How do you manage dating multiple women at the same time? How do you break up with women? How do you keep them as friends with benefits? How do you turn them into your girlfriend? Frank has better answers than any coach I’ve seen. I was particularly interested to hear his perspectives on non-monogamous relationships and their management as I’ve always believed there was another way for me than the traditional roles of being either ‘single’ and commitment free, or in a totally monogamous relationship. Even coaches with very solid material don’t seem to go into non-monogamous relationship advice – typically they advocate being single and having experiences forever – but this gets lonely.
Frank’s material is on a much higher level altogether than anything else I’ve seen out there – and honestly I’ve read an enormous amount and I have always put it into practice. That's not to say that there isn't other good stuff out there but Frank has a profound, detailed knowledge of relationships, going into areas often neglected by others such as the best locations for dates and the best locations to actually meet single women who are looking to meet guys. These sound like obvious points but they once you have the skills, these are the kind of questions that need addressing. More importantly though is Frank’s ‘hierarchy of relationships’ and ‘emotional needs analysis’ theories give you immediately usable tools to manage, screen and maintain your relationships in a way that is healthy for both men and women. The program was a reasonable investment for me but those modules alone were worth the fee. I’ve quite literally never encountered anything that gives you the perspective of these two tools. The Hierarchy of relationships in particular gives you the framework to manage all relationships.
I work in the field of education myself, and at numerous points during the program I really have thought that this material should be available to all students aged 18 – the government should send you a copy as birthday present! Seriously, if I’d had this preparation ten years ago I would have had so many better relationships and most certainly have caused far less emotional upset through mismanaging relationships. When you learn the depth of this stuff you realize that most upset and real traumas in relationships and breakups are cause by ignorance of emotional needs or poor management of relationships. Nobody wants things to get messed up – it’s just that society leaves us largely ignorant in these matters. That’s why some of Frank’s discoveries are so amazing and so valuable.
I worked hard on the program and really committed to the assignments. I’m glad I did as it really allowed me to make the most of the sessions and I got a huge amount out of them. Frank doesn’t mince his words in the sessions – he gives you direct and often challenging perspectives. I can’t count the number of times I’ve come away from the sessions feeling like I just understood something about relationships, women or myself in a new, deeper light. Frank’s not a flash teacher, he conducts the classes from his home and doesn’t seem to have any outward features that would make this stuff come easily to him. In fact if anything, outwardly you’d probably never guess at the depth of wisdom and experience he has in dating and all types of relationships, including non-monogamous ones. The program exercises were unorthodox to say the least but they make sense if you do them properly. Frank’s depth of knowledge about all areas of dating and relationship management is staggering even to someone who has encountered a lot of it. Frank’s original theories are innovative and incredibly helpful – seriously I would even go as far to say they are a true masterpiece of insight for relationships. I really hope this knowledge spreads to as much of the world as possible as people can only benefit from it.
After a 10 week course (2hr per week) I now have a ton of material to go over and to continue to update over the years. Before this program this area was hazy and I was going round in circles despite putting effort in. I now have the course is set, I have my compass and map at hand and all I have to do is to keep going on my journey.
I honestly would have no hesitation in recommending Frank to anyone who was looking to get greater fulfillment in relationships. In fact, I would say that if you are not working with Frank or reading his material, honestly you're missing out. Even guys who already know how to get women could really learn a ton from him - in fact I think that for more advanced guys - Frank is the only coach out there who can actually help you to progress further in whatever direction you want to go in.
-Review by Joseph
(*UPDATE - IN LESS THAN 3 YEARS OF JOSEPH TAKING THIS PROGRAM, HE GOT MARRIED AND WELCOMED HIS FIRST CHILD INTO THE WORLD)
My date on Friday was amazing! I also did hear from the other guy that I went out with and we are still communicating!
I'm so happy I went on my date Friday cause to be honest, I would have never given that gentleman a chance because he has a regular job and seems normal and drives a non luxury car (I am being honest) - but he turned out to be like....wow! So hot, so sexy, 6 feet, so manly etc...
I remembered you told me to go on dates anyway if I didn't really feel like it! I see what you were getting at Now! That guy has been after me for 3 months! And he DID chase me as well! I was just thinking he wouldn't be my type, on the contrary, we have so much in common! Now, all I want to do is to see him again!!!!! He's so hot!!!
It's funny how I get so many dating coaches inviting me to events and wanting to help, I always tell them: "I'm being coached by Frank, thanks but no thanks" - I'm always promoting you.
“I am a woman, it’s my time”.
These words, along with the attentive coaching from Frank has dramatically changed my life. I have been working on myself as a recovering addict, a recovering sexual anorexic and as a survivor of incest. I do not do well with vague advice, and as a woman of 38 years with very little healthy dating and a whole lot of confusion,
I have a lot of respect and gratitude for Frank’s work. It is clear. It is straightforward. It is effective.
From the simplest advice of making eye contact, smiling and nodding, I got a date in a series of upcoming dates that holds a new pattern of thinking and living for me.
To be clear -previously I would advert my eyes and walk in the other direction if someone attractive was near me. This is an old habit formed in childhood that no longer protected me.
Frank’s listening skills and discerning care gave me the courage to try new behaviors and with his simple technique, stopped a man in his tracks, literally stepping onto an escalator, backtrack and come over to say hello.We exchanged numbers.
Frank’s professionalism is a major component in choosing to trust and I encourage you to step forward, lovingly give yourself a chance to be open and learn to love and be loved.
If you’re like me, and need your hand held step by step, then you are at the right place.
-Review by Dionna Gracelove, Montreal
I have learned dating from a few world famous dating coaches in last a few years, the only person who I still want to get advice from is Frank Kermit now. Why? The Value!
I believe Frank's coaching provide me the best value. Frank's advice is precise and get into the point, he is always available when you need him, and his fee is very reasonable. I am still using him as my coach now, and will do in the future until I become the person I want to be.
His ON CALL availability is very important to me because I want to solve my problem as soon as possible, and Frank's advice can help me to solve my problem immediately.
-Review by H. Jiang,
Frank will change your life. Period. When I started counseling with Frank, I can honestly say I did not know what to expect. I have tried many venues of counseling and coaching through all kinds of teachers, and spent lots of money on the so-called “boot camps” and even on the self-proclaimed dating experts in Canada and the United States. Without any reservation, I confidently say that even one hour with Frank was the most illuminating and enlightening.
Frank understands the psychology of Love to its deepest essence. He shares with you his philosophy and methodology from his vast experience and time studying human behavior, not in mere pickup and seduction, but in truly understanding what a successful relationship is. His tough love teaching style helped me understand every sticking point in my approach to romance.
Yes, he will break you down but then build you right back up effectively, starting from first hour of chatting with him. He truly digs deep into your own psychology and helps you understand yourself and why you behave in such a way that may sabotage a new love, a relationship, or even a failing marriage. And the reality of it all, is that it all starts with self-awareness and knowledge. From there, all else falls in place easily.
His ‘Emotional-Needs’ theory is right on target.
All you need is a notebook, a pen, and an open mind. Spending time with Frank for me was simply an invaluable epiphany in understanding myself and in approaching and treating women, in the most natural attractive and effective way, without fancy pickup lines and ridiculous so-called “Tricks”.
If you are struggling with dating, finding a girlfriend, holding on to the love of your life, or even your marriage is falling apart, he WILL HELP YOU.
He changed my life and undoubtedly I guarantee he will change yours. Trust him and keep an open mind!
-Review by Max L., M.D.
Toronto Ontario Canada
I was very reluctant to use Frank Kermit's ‘Pay As You Go Coaching’ services. I knew about his practice for over two years but I was convinced that I could work things out on my own. I was a forty-year old virgin prior to working with Frank. My love life was in shambles and I was pretty much scared of my own shadow when it came to meeting women.
In just two short months working with Frank, I went from missing out on life and feeling inferior to other men to becoming much more self-confident about myself and having a huge weight lifted off my shoulders.
I used to have this checklist of attributes that a woman needed to possess in order for me to date them. It turned out that I would create this impossible list as a defense mechanism. In my mind there was always something wrong with women, when all I was doing was setting myself up for the fall.
Friends and family said that I was too picky and awkward when talking about relationships; I subsequently found out that I had many behaviours of an Adult Male Virgin. There was nothing wrong with me physically. In fact, many people have mentioned in the past that I was a good-looking man. I just sat on my fanny waiting for somebody to lead the way.
No more! Frank's approach is what is called tough love. Look elsewhere if you are seeking a coach leaving you with a warm and fuzzy feeling inside. His sessions are meant to provide you with the right tools when faced with a situation where you are in direct contact with a woman on a romantic/sexual level.
I admit to finishing a few sessions exhausted, or wanting to throw a brick at Frank!
By investing myself fully in the sessions, I was greatly rewarded by getting the results I was seeking. It's not only relationships that we tackled; we also discussed many different factors that would lead me to a fulfilled life.
Frank also did a fantastic job of following up with me outside of the sessions. I am still a work in progress but aren't we all? I still need to grow more as a person, but I now see it as a challenge rather than an obstacle.
That being said, the proof is in the pudding: My lover said that she has never been more passionate for a man, and that I knew how to please her. Quite the accomplishment for this inexperienced fellow and former adult male virgin!
-Review by Tony, Burlington, Ontario
The time I've spent talking to Frank in one-on-one sessions has always proven to be incredibly valuable. I always get a lot out of it. Often I'll just go in asking for a bit of direction and advice and come away with actionable information and a sense that I had gotten good information from a person who has both an understanding of what it's like to go this development (and then has a good idea of where you should probably focus) and a deep understanding of women and relationships. It's the kind of constructive conversation that comes out of talking to the right person for what you want to learn. It's just really helpful.
-Review by Don A., Toronto
I want to thank you for your great help yesterday. I finally opened my eyes. I had them close for awhile.
You made my world change in 90 minutes. Everything was a eye opening.
Me not leaving my apartment thinking I might find Mr right; that was wrong. I was to afraid to open up my sexually, thinking of what men would think of me.
Also you made me realize how my depression and anxiety was affecting my life.
I will be starting to see a therapist for it as you suggested. Thank you Frank!
-Review by Courtney A,
I had a phone consultation with Frank and we discussed a couple of important topics. First was the idea of giving a girl too much before she earned it, and her feeling like she owes something back to you at some point.
I told Frank about a story of a girl I was dating, and how I felt that at some point she should want to reciprocate but I always felt I was giving her more than she was giving back. I started to think, how I know when I should expect something of her in a relationship, and when I'm just being paranoid. This is part of relationship management after all.
Frank gave me a really great rule of thumb. You cannot expect anything from her, because when you expect things from others, you can only be disappointed. Instead, what I should be doing is expecting something from me. I can empower myself by expecting that I will stand up for my boundaries of wanting to be treated fairly and with respect, by communicating my standards and what I would like in return for doing something for the other person. This will avoid me feeling disappointing the other person didn't follow through on what I would like them to do, and instead give them clear indication of what I am looking for. At this point, Frank mentions it is still important you not expect them to get it done, but instead monitor them to see if they get it done. If they do, then you know they can be relied on to do that. If they cannot, you know clearly what you can and cannot get out of this person. This will help you in determining how far along your able to take any relationship.
Frank says, you must always keep this in mind: In any relationship, one person is going to always feel like they are giving more than the other. Equality in all things is an intellectual construct, and in real life it hardly works out that way. One person is always taking on more burden than the other, etc. It is OK if I am giving more than the other, as long as it's even somewhat equitable. If the other person is giving nothing and I give a car to them, then there is something wrong.
This brings up to the second point, how to figure out the same thing with friends, and not just lovers. It came out that it's the same rule applies, don't have expectations, and just communicate what it is you want clearly. The only time you screw up is by not expecting yourself to communicate what you are looking for in return. By being quiet, I am only hurting myself, building anger and frustration inside. I helped a friend move, and in return I should have communicated clearly that next time he goes to a party he invite me if he can. That would be an example of communicating my expectation for doing something. After that point, it's just about monitoring to see if that friend can follow through on what I asked. If not, then you know what you can get out of that person, and what you cannot, and you slot them accordingly.
Just a quick note to say thanks for your great work and coaching. The insights in your products improved the quality of my life 10 fold! I grew up with a lot of dominant females around me. Now I have the skill to be the man that they crave. Thanks again.
- Douglas McK.,
I must say that to me, what I found most helpful, was that Frank Kermit remembers when he was a Loser. There's much more sympathy in him than what I see out of other gurus out there who have long since become naturals, and unable to understand why people simply can't "be like them."
To me, Kermit can be summed up in one sentence: He respects you, and demands the same respect. Be it women, men, people beneath him, people above him, doesn't matter. He treats everybody with the same respect and dignity you wish you would receive from others.
That is remarkably more charismatic, and what a remarkable way to conduct yourself: To be a man, but not a bully. You have definitely earned my respect. I look forward to hearing more from you.
- Raymond Hessel, USA
I highly recommend Frank's personalized coaching. His emotional needs analysis theories are sound and testable. His style is direct and brutally honest without being judgmental. His insight and knowledge are truly a gift to the world. The results speak for themselves.
I have learned to communicate and connect with women in a much more meaningful way. I have a confidence now that cannot be shaken. Feelings of anger and frustration have dissolved. Franks coaching has taken me from a painful breakup to sexual abundance in a matter of weeks.
He has taught me how to think about relationships in a way that works. I cannot say that about any other material or methods I have studied.
Many thanks to Frank Kermit, I was really hopeless. However, I had a good meeting with him and we realized some points. I did not put enough effort. I worked on it from time to time. I got average results because I put in average efforts. I am not broken, I just have to work harder. So, nothing to worry about here.
I was always raised as a perfectionist by my family. Whenever I got 4 out of 5 in school, I was shown anger as a small example. So, the background I am coming from is not good. I have to learn to be independent and I have to stop perfectionism. I see myself as good environment( but not so good in terms of the way I was raised) but not good learning skills for social skills. So, I need to work hard. I worked less and I got average results until now. I did not put support myself in addition to events I attended. It is like going to school and not missing lessons but not putting effort yourself and expecting to get good results.
I was like a student who did not miss classes but who did not put enough effort. Problem is the issue inside me which sabotages every good thing I try to achieve since things I work on are never perfect. Thanks Kermit for helping me analyze my issues and now time to go back to trying to date women.
NO REASON TO QUIT, I JUST NEED TO WORK HARDER.
-S. M. from Turkey
Review of Frank Coaching: It's Nutrition for the Heart and Soul:
On my quest to learn about what makes relationships work I stumbled across a Saturday evening workshop hosted by Frank Kermit which I have been attending since May of this year. I say stumble because I had mentioned to my sister what I was looking for and one day she handed me an article in the newspaper written by Frank that resonated with me. Underneath the column was the information I needed to attend my first workshop.
It has become my Saturday night of choice ever since, not only because I enjoy the topics that Frank presents but also because I enjoy the core group of students that we have become and the potential for that group to grow.
When I started out back in May I walked in not knowing anyone and now I walk in and greet close to a dozen people by name and I look forward to doubling that by years end. I can see the difference these classes are making in my everyday dealings with friends, family and social interactions.
I'm learning to recognize the needs of others as well as my own and how to best handle these needs. I've learned that I am only 50% of each relationship and as good as I am, it might not be enough. One of my most memorable evenings was when I walked out having been made aware that I should no longer give my attention where it is not earned. Who would have thunk it……lol
It's like hitting your forehead and saying I should have had a V8. It's nutrition for the heart and soul. I feel like I have my own personal coach because there is not a question that I’ve asked that has gone unanswered. Every class I am made aware of the strength in numbers because we are all dealing with something and the sense of knowing that I am not alone. It is just so empowering. For me, there are six days a week that I can take my new found knowledge and put it into practice, but there is only one Saturday night that offers me the potential to learn how to better use the other days of the week. I would recommend Frank coaching..........who would have thunk it.....lol
Coaching with Frank has been well worth the price of admission for me.
For anybody considering signing up for coaching - it is well worth it!
Being able to describe what my goals are, and have Frank coach me to reaching them faster than I would have on my own has made a huge difference in my life. I have greatly benefited from being able to call Frank in both crisis/important moments where I needed advice on the spot, as well on regular days when I just had specific questions tailored to my personal needs, where the answers cannot always be found elsewhere.
To me, access to this type of help, advice and info has been life-changing!
I would highly recommend that anyone considering coaching sign up and try it. I am very happy that I decided to give it a shot, and I am enjoying the benefits of the work today!
-John Chapin, Ontario
A coaching review from Debby: Hi Frank! You and I had a telephone coaching session back in January. I want to thank you for helping me to make sense of my relationship with my boyfriend.
You advised me to think about whether exclusivity was a good idea given the fact that our relationship was and had always been long distance. You also said that it was important to define our relationship and be on the same page about our wants and needs for the future. You also pointed out that at age 40 I needed to decide whether I wanted to have any children. Of course this subject had been floating around in my mind for a while, but you really put it out there and told me that these decisions needed to made very, very soon!
Our relationship was going on for a year and a half and there were no solid plans for the future. At that time, I was very concerned that my boyfriend did not show any urgency towards closing the gap between us and building a life together.
The following month after our coaching session, I told my boyfriend that I had to do some serious thinking about my life and make some important decisions about my future. I asked him for a couple of weeks without contact to figure this out. I explained that some of what I needed to think about was regarding him and that some of it had to do with other aspects of my life. I asked nothing of him other than the temporary space I needed to discern everything.
Within two weeks he contacted me to say that he realized how much he did not want to lose me and that he no longer wanted the distance between us. He asked me to move to California to live with him. I agreed. I am moving on June 1st.
Then last week, he asked me to marry him!
Thank you so much for giving me the wake-up call that I needed! What you said about the situation was the truth. I just wanted to update you to let you know how it turned out.
Thanks again for the coaching!
I was referred by my sex therapist to get coaching with Frank. My goal was to improve my social and emotional skills that would allow me to connect more intimately with women. Five months later, I feel my life is getting back on track. The fact that I understand better the emotional needs of women. The fact that I can understand the emotional needs of men, I can now categorize women better in my life. After listening to his audio programs and reading a lot of his books, I realize that he is the true professor when it comes to dating and relationships; in fact I consider him a doctorate of life experiences who has explored every possible angle when it comes to women and relationships. I strongly encourage men and women of all ages and backgrounds to try his coaching. He is the real deal and a proper mentor that will properly guide you to better relationship fulfillment.
– Anonymous male student
Hey Frank, Robert here. Just wanted to write a thank you for the time spent learning from your many insights. In more than one way my life has changed because of your influence.
I started off not knowing much, was not very confident as I had no reason to be with women. You took the time to see if I was willing to go on the road, and I have. I really have. I took in all your work, and tried to formulate a real world understanding of it. Many a times I've been hardheaded, maybe somewhat cocky, and a little redundant, but those are the growing pains. Like giving birth to a child, it can be an arduous task, but if you see worth in it, it can have great merit. I would like to believe that your work that is inspired to help men's lives become better is what led me to you, and let me grow side by side with others.
I am ever grateful, and I will always remember the lesson to, "Pass it on". This kind of wonderful gift cannot be worded as if it was a shallow fountain of youth, with worry of it drying up. This is something that I will try and share with the world, one person at a time.
The times you explained to me what I needed to do, when I had so much worries in my head, when I wanted to break down and cry because I couldn't make heads or tails of this huge new world I was stepping in to, were so important in my mind. You gave me direct steps and instructions. You guided my path, with a firm hand and let me know it would be OK.
Your books did the rest, in helping me do the necessary work, by studying and applying their teachings. I felt so understood and accepted, I felt like you really knew what I was going through, and it made me wanna melt inside that there was someone who could understand the pain I was going through, and had gone through already.
Thank you so much for your work. I am already picturing my future family wife and kids. It is a lot more reality now that I know what I know, as compared to years ago when a lot of it was hopeful thinking and dream fantasies. I can say that it is just a matter of planning and work at this point, as it is well within the realm of attainable. Thank you again for this wonderful gift.
-Review by Robert,
Toronto, Ontario, Canada
Frank, you said you find value in having general feedback like this in written format so you can look at it. I think I can express myself best this way anyways.
I was thinking about this earlier today (your last day in Toronto) and I concluded that I think you've had more influence on shaping my life as it is now, than anyone else I know outside of myself.
Sure, the emotional needs and many of your teachings, pass through my head in one way or another constantly and that alone would a lot. And sure, a lot of the lifestyle choices I've made were based on advice or learning about myself that I got with your guidance, but the impact you had on me personally was also largely due to your taking chances on me, that forced me to grow up.
Actually it was obvious you were the real deal after my first conversation with you, where you already started giving me advice that would later prove to be invaluable. Strangely, that exact piece of advice ("It's about making people feel good.") is still something that helps me every day.
After our first meeting I continued to bounce around through all the endless material out there. Struggling to fix myself and being constantly exposed and taught by my own weaknesses. Eventually I decided it was time to settle down and choose a way, and I chose the emotional needs and discarded the rest. It was the dead of winter and I entered into what I call my "dark night of the soul" period. Under your guidance I began to go super deep, got the help I needed, and did change work I would have thought impossible.
It's how I can believe in your work so much: I dredged up every horrid and ugly thing I could out of my mind, and you and your work were there with me as I did, like someone holding a patients hand as they fight to survive.
I stepped back into the work like a new born after that. Just started small, going to bookstores... trying little things here and there. Seeing all kinds of things that were hidden before.
Cut to almost a year later and my lifestyle in completely different because of decisions I was able to make and take responsibility for. I did the growing, (which I'm still doing) but you gave me something I couldn't get on my own and that was someone believing in me and being a kind of friend I didn't know existed. Most importantly, being a mentor. I honesty believe if I hadn't met you, I'd still be a boy.
It's funny and really ironic now, that I naturally don't want to talk of having and loosing virginity, having a mentor, or studying emotional needs because YOU showed me how those things are often unattractive. But I'll see if I can suspend my persona "Art" long enough to just point out that "Art" is a son of "Kermit" and owes a lot of his attractiveness to him.
At your last supper in Toronto with all your students, you mentioned tonight that on some level you didn't really want to leave this city, despite it's flaws. Well, in my opinion, you'll never completely leave because at least in my world, you helped shape this city, just like you helped shape me as a man.
We'll see ya next time you're in the flaky city Kermit.
-Review by Art D.,
Toronto, Ontario Canada
This is Butch G writing to give thanks & praise for Frank's help. Using his Emotional Needs and reading his past books From Loser to Seducer is a Godsend. I highly recommend every male out there get on board with his stuff while it's still out there. He also helped me with an online challenge with an woman that wasn't sure if she wanted to move forward with me or not.
She said she was thinking of telling me that we should just be friends. Using what I learned from Frank and his emotional needs, she and I are now secret friends-with-benefits. She calls me her "practice guy"! Frank really helped me to stay involved with her when others would probably have given up at that point. His personal help is really invaluable and the insight he has is golden. I look forward to staying in touch in the future.
Take care guys.
-Review by Butch G,
Toronto, Ontario, Canada
Awesome !! You completely break the dating coach stereotype. Someone might initially ask themselves how can this guy have appropriate experience to become dating coach given the way you look? Then I realized... hey maybe he's breaking a first impression for a reason. Then I thought, well he probably went trough objections way more than the average guy and seems hes talking from experience.
The reason I seek out your coaching: you get me `"pumped up" before going out. You focus my mind to what I really want in a relationship and give me great conversation material. Plus your exercise are quite fun and refreshing. Approaching strangers for the first time, after a long day of work on the computer, is not always easy, getting it done and over with sets the tone for the rest of the night.
-Review by Marco E.
Just over a year ago today I emailed you with my predicament; I did not get a chance to thank you because for a long time I was in a very dark place. My girlfriend of 5 years left me. I always remember the lesson you once taught me: “you failed because you fail to consider the consequences of your actions.” While I already knew nothing good can come of what I’ve done, it still hurt a lot. I think it hurt me that I hurt her so deeply.
So for the next three months it was a time of reflection. I remember being in this place before. Going through the coaching workbook I'm a Man, That's My Job and the Emotional Needs Analysis materials some how kept me busy and brought back some sense of mental sanity.
I continue to try to call her, text, emailed her here and there for almost a month after she ran out. I knew it was over. She did not have to say it. I just wanted to see how she was doing and as much as I missed her… I knew I messed up and she deserves better.
About two weeks after new year I received a text from her. “do you have time to meet up?” I seriously did not expect that … or for her to ever contact me again. It’s a new year and maybe she wanted to start new and put the pass behind us. Either way I knew I had to meet her so we met up for a coffee.
It was great to see her after all these months; she looked the same. I told her she can ask me anything she wanted and I do my best to answer her. The first thing she asked me was: “Does anyone else know about this?” I was thinking; Ok definitely Emotional Needs #1.
She continued on. She wanted to know what I was doing now – I told her self – reflection. I just told her straight up. As a man, there are certain emotional needs that we have. I don’t think my way of satisfying these emotional needs was not the right way to go, but none the less the emotional needs are there. I knew in my mind after doing more Emotional Needs Analysis homework, that I just neglected my own needs focusing on handling her sexuality.
So a long story short, we are talking again. All I can think right now is emotional needs. She went out and met other guys, they did not meet her emotional needs. I violated some of her emotional needs for sure. However, I must have addressed enough emotional needs for her to come back in my life. We are taking things slowly now. We have not put a label on what we are. She stays over from time to time.
I guess what I am trying to say Frank is thank you. Thank you again for what you have taught me. I am forever grateful.
-Review from your student, Heyzeus,
I have worked with Frank for 3 months and lost my virginity last night!!! I was a 40 year old virgin, who has a great career, good friends, and I am close with my family.
The reason I was an Adult Male Virgin was that I did not have a strong male role model to follow, and at the same time, I grew up with a very strict religious upbringing which kept me unconsciously self-sabotaging myself.
Dating women had always been my weakness until I met Frank.
I am not the same person I was before, to the point that my friends have all said that I have changed a lot. Frank taught me Emotional Needs Analysis which was a game changer!
Currently I am able to attract a variety of women even thought I am not a tall man and I am overweight.
To all the Adult Male Virgins out there: Don’t let yourself make excuses that a woman is too attractive, too intelligent, too tall, or anything else. Stop procrastinating! You will feel much worse the longer you wait to have sex.
This is still a learning process and I have a lot of room to grow, but a huge weight has been lifted off my shoulders. I no longer feel less than other men, or inadequate.
Frank told me that we all knew at least one woman that wanted to date us when we were younger and most of us turned them down. If we had taken that chance, we never would have been Adult Male Virgins, we would have been Naturals!
I now look forward to having relationships with women, and ultimately looking for that one special woman to share my life with. The woman I am seeing now said that I was one of the best men that she had met in her life and that means a lot to me. I am learning a lot about how to treat and react around women that treat me well.
Tell your wife that I appreciate her patience with you spending time with me during those last minute emergency calls, and that it was a great help in changing my life for the better.
Again your help and work has been invaluable to me finally starting to realize a satisfying life. My love life was the biggest thing that was out of balance.
Off and on I thought about killing myself because I was a 40 year old virgin. Your help, and the moment of beauty with my lover (MY LOVER?) changed all that in a short time. A huge weight has been lifted off my shoulder and I feel so relaxed that it surprises me.
-Review by Ethan,
Review: "Frank, It was nice meeting you and Thanks so much for all of your advice and guidance. It was helpful in many different levels.
First of all, I did not even know until you pointed out today that guys are looking for more clear and specific answers. and they want us to have a clear life plan. but that totally makes sense as we all have our busy lives and priorities and do not want to waste time with someone who is so unsure about their lives.
I really appreciated you giving me your personal experiences as examples which made me feel more comfortable to talk and open up with you thru this session.
Secondly, by you asking me all those questions, it really made me realize how unsure I am or how I have not even put myself at all to even think about them. I liked how you would suggest me to rephrase what I wanted to say in more clear and rational way. You also made me realized how important it is to speak clear with confidence and with eye contact.
Thirdly, It was refreshing to hear the male perspectives and opinions on dating. because we women sometime have no ideas and completely misunderstand things. I learned to be straight forward and need to indicate "the Hint”.
Overall, It was an amazing experience and I would love to get your help again. You were very “real”, got to the points and I learned a lot about what needs to be clear and changed. I will definitely work on my homework and go thru all the questions you have asked me. (ended up taking 8pages of notes!!!!)
-Review by Ms Regine, (Match-Making Client)
Toronto, Ontario, Canada
My one word to describe Franks coaching style would be: Incisive.
He addressed two pieces of my personality that have always plagued me: My tendency to put myself down, and my tonality. The thing that I like about Frank is his emphasis on the how and the why you do things rather that just the what.
I think this is important in two ways:
one is that most people on a basic level understand what it is that they do or they need to improve on, but without understanding why it is they do those things.
And the second reason is that it's very difficult, at least in my experience, to alter a behaviour or pursue something new without understanding the reason why it needs to be done rather than just doing it for its sake.
I always understood that I had problems communicating with people (i.e. being charismatic) and he showed me that the reason that I have problems communicating with people is that I am trying to communicate with them through my way of viewing the world (being a kinetics person). And that charisma is being able to communicate with people in their way of viewing the world.
The emotional needs were a huge eye opener for me and I am already starting to assess things in relation to the top ten emotional needs. I still have however a long time to go and a ton of work to do in order to get this side of my life handled but I can tell that this is a great start and that I picked the right coach.
-Review by R. F.,
Toronto, Ontario, Canada
During a recent counseling session with Frank I was advised that I pushed a girl I work with into “mommy” territory by my remarks. My MBA is a milestone in life for me, and a personal achievement, not an added credential to give me bragging rights - but when I mention any area whatsoever in my life, where I think I could probably improve, I put myself into mommy territory.
The "cut female friends who are not getting you girls" seemed harsh, especially to a guy who has limited male friendships as well and may want to keep the friend around simply for the sake of being able to go out and have some kind of company. I saw tremendous value in Frank’s recommendation from his other works to (paraphrased) “stop hanging out in social circles where you know you won’t have a chance of female interaction that could lead to sex – either you’ve approached all the girls in the group and they’re not interested, or they’re all dating the men in the group.”
I have indeed done that – cut, and limited those meets.
In my experience, social dynamics and being perceived to lack value have been my bigger obstacle to meeting girls through my 20’s and having successful encounters. I hung out with a group of people through my 20’s, who all knew each other very well, had lots of secondary, tertiary, (and beyond), friends, many of whom were attractive and female. The first girl I went out on a real date with occurred at 24, and was with a girl who picked a fight with me on our 3rd meet. - It was challenging to read that this could have been a test that I simply failed to pass. I was pretty upset for the better part of that year over that girl, as I also met no new ones. I liked the concept of “Feel the emotion, but control the behavior”, but the feeling the emotion is one of the main issues I’m addressing in my counseling.
-Review by Phil M. MBA
I have been attending the “Frank Talks” coaching workshops regularly. I have to write to say how lucky we are to have this opportunity to work on relationships with someone of Frank’s caliber. Not only has Frank studied as many coaches and therapist do, but he really has had life experiences that pierces the heart and minds of some of his listeners.
I know I have left many a night with an a-ha experience. This is where the lights turn on in your brain a little brighter and you can understand and see a potential red flag more quickly than before. A red flag being the way in which your perspective new friend talks, acts or believes that you see could really annoy you or won’t match your values in love, no matter how nice they may seem. One ignores the red flags to their own peril.
In Frank’s work you learn to spot their potential problems quicker and also spot people who really would be a good fit with you. I must say I’ve read tons of books. I’ve read that it’s good to ask questions and that you can have a better understanding of how a person thinks by their answers. Yes, it made sense, but I never really did it a lot. Now, after Frank’s practice with Speed Dating, and questions …I finally get it. It’s not making the person’s answers right or wrong. It’s finding out who is more in alignment with you. It’s exciting and fun!
Frank just made dating more fun for me! Where as before I felt dating was a heavy chore and definitely something not fun. But the a-ha moment that really came during this was asking the same questions that I made up and listening to those men’s different answers. We had 7 minutes with each man and that night I asked 7 different men questions and to have 7 different answers. I really could see whom I was more compatible with. The more questions one asks, the better you are. Non-threatening, fun questions. To find out one’s inner soul. Glorious!
Reading is fine but having the knowledge and getting the chance to put it into practice. Priceless.
Thank You Frank!
–Review by Anonymous Female Student
When I broke up with my first boyfriend I thought that it was my fault; like I had either done something wrong or didn’t do something right in the relationship.
I told a friend of mine that I was feeling confused about the relationship so she suggested attending Frank Kermit’s relationship group. I wanted to get a better understanding of what being in a relationship all about.
I learned from being in Frank’s group that I wasn’t the fault of the relationship going wrong. I also learned that I lacked the self confidence in myself to be able to see that the failed relationship wasn’t my fault.
Believing in myself didn’t come easily. It took me a long time but now I have more faith in myself than I did before.
Today, I have a partner who understands me and supports me even when my insecurities pop up from time to time..
-Review by Cindy M.,
Review: Hi Frank, Thanks so much for your coaching, and also the information you have given me has proved invaluable. I now have begun dating the girl we were talking about. Your words, guidance, coaching have been so insightful and helpful and I can't thank you enough.
It's early days we're taking it slowly, I am determined to do this the right way and get off on a good start, we've spoken about boundaries, so things are moving along nicely. Look forward to having another session with you soon. (PS. congratulations on the increased media coverage you're now getting, I truly hope it continues to be an upward trajectory for you this year and beyond, you deserve it and we need more of you out there, Canada can't keep you to herself).
- Review by Barron S,
***Review of Frank coaching and teachings in general - various formats and mediums - Donald (Canada)
I believe Frank, through is work is directly truly helping men and women better their relationships and he does this by upholding the highest standard of honesty with himself and his students. It's this integrity that demands that he knows how everything fits together as is demonstrated by his works and by his ability to speak on relationships.
Frank helped me take relationships from magical things to things that are simply complicated but with discipline, understandable.
Frank's guidance early in my own education was invaluable. He introduced he to concepts, people, and he provided for me a mentorship that above all allowed me to go on and forge my own personal understanding of sexuality, health, my ideal lifestyle and my ideal self. That was important because no one could really teach me to live my current lifestyle. Frank gave me the language to develop my own thing completely.
When someone puts the work into making things clear that Frank does it's hard for a committed student to NOT absorbed the information. If you're relationship(s) need help or you're marriage could be better, Frank is who to talk to.
-Review by Donald
Review: My meeting with Frank was quite interesting, it helped me to clearly identify and pinpoint what went wrong in some particular relationship situation. Especially in knowing how to cater to the little girl inside her. This is really powerful, it will have a significant impact going forward. The other topic is to set expectations by establishing my life plan. Actually, I have one, but I wasn't really sure about sharing it or when to share. Basically the sooner is the better and again this is another powerful tool. There are few more adjustments that I'll do too in terms of complimenting my future girlfriend. I wasn't aware that those few things were so important for women.
-Review by Male MatchMaking Client
My first consultation with Frank Kermit was interesting. How was it interesting? I used Skype to contact him and we could see each other. It was close and personal and Frank made me feel comfortable.
We didn't waste time. Frank got right to it: What am I looking for? And he told me what I had to do....right away. I have now bought 2 books "Everything Out of Her Mouth is a Test" and "The Emotional Needs Workbook" to get the ball rolling.
After my first consult with Frank I have a clearer picture of what I need to do to get the results I want. It feels great to be on the path and realize I have a lot of changing to do.
Thank you Frank!
-Review by Lou P.,
A review of Email Coaching for dating:
I sort of came across Frank’s site FrankTalks.com accidentally. After clicking around and reading many of the blog articles posted (especially on my issue that I was dealing with) I learned that he had a very unique, keen and insightful view, not really handed down to him either, but something he himself worked very very hard to obtain.
I had (now that I look back on it, and I’m sure he’d agree) the nerve to contact him about my issue. I write “nerve” because at first I thought the question was going to be simple and to the point. Instead I wrote this EXTREMELY long, drawn out, wuss-filled banter. Didn’t mean to, but I guess my issue that I was having sort of brought out the best in me, so to speak.
(In coaching) he basically took what I wrote, broke it down, and addressed every single issue. I must stress it, EVERY SINGLE issue. He gave me tips, he gave me sound advice, he mentions what he went through, he mentions some helpful excerpts from his book, yes he gave me verbal “slaps”, but for my issue he sort of has to and ultimately it will only benefit me and I most definitely did not mind that.
Bottom line, he doesn’t know me, I don’t really know him either, aside from what’s on his site, yet he worked very very hard, to give me a hand. I’m not writing this so that you can visit his site for “free advice”, I think we know it’s not like that, but it’s definitely worth mentioning how far he can go for you and will go for you. He is self-taught, self-motivated and to put it plainly but effectively, just a genuine person as well, to take the time he did for me….
-Review by N. V.
This review is from a former adult male virgin who purchased the '100 Hours Coaching Package’ with Frank as well as purchasing and studying the ‘Adult Male Virgins Seminar’, ‘From Friends To Lovers: Stop Being Her Emotional Cookie Man’ eBook, and the ‘How To Build A Social Circle Network’ program.
Frank, it’s working!!
In the past few weeks my social circles have reached critical mass! I am suddenly meeting more quality women than ever before without a lot of effort other than showing up!
Last night I was able to be with a woman who had been a close platonic friend for almost a year. I had previously been very uncomfortable pushing the relationship into that region for some reason. Your coaching provided me with the ability to find the motivation to take the necessary actions when it was time, as in the past I didn't make a move when it was time.
This was exactly the kind of non-drunken sex I had always wanted but did not get until now, and it felt great!
I am really happy with the direction my life is going in now.
-Review by Samuel P.,
St. Paul., Minnesota, USA
The more I listen to you, Frank, the more impressed I am. I don't like everything you have to say, but I am quickly learning that in most cases you are basically right, and if I don't take what you are saying into account I'm just going to get burned again.
-Review by Anon
Toronto, Ontario, Canada
Frank is worth traveling for! One of Canada's best kept secrets is Frank Kermit's coaching. I have been attending these life-changing workshops and I travel a considerable distance simply because they are more than worth it. Attending Frank Kermit's coaching has been an eye-opening, life-changing experience. Through Frank's coaching, I have come to read his articles, read his books and listed to his audios and am quite honestly 'blown-away'.
His wide knowledge base, his real-life experience and his easy, informative and entertaining manner make Frank unlike any other relationship coach; he is so much more than that. It is my deep desire to get a firm grasp on my personal relationships once-and-for-all, and if that rings true for you too, I urge you to hire coaches. You simply cannot go wrong. There is always something new to learn, and most importantly, to put into practice Frank has a deep, profound understanding of what makes relationships tick.
That, and the simple fact that Frank knows how to teach and entertain in such a unique and creative way, you'll always walk away with more and more real-life skills; I know I have. He leads his coaching adeptly through stories, exercises and by example, and he shows how to date with integrity and confidence. He even shows how to spot the 'red flags' of problem dates early on, saving you valuable time and heartache.
Frank teaches how to rid your life of limiting beliefs and patterns. You learn to heal old hurts and wounds to make way for new-found knowledge, confidence and ultimately powerful, effective relationship skills. I am truly grateful to be lucky enough to experience his work first-hand.
You have to ask yourself not if you can afford to work with Frank but rather can you afford not to work with Frank? I urge you to bring joy back into your life and to take your relationship-life by the horns and make the time to work with Frank. After all, a great life and great relationships go hand-in-hand.
-Review by M. T.,
Ottawa, Ontario, Canada
*A review of a lecture Frank gave in Montreal
Wow, what an amazing speech, views and person,
First impression upon seeing Frank for the first time: WTF, that guy won't ever get laid, even less talk about meeting women, not even in a million years. Why the f*** is everybody looking up to him? Intriguing.
Then the magic started (he opened his mouth) and the vibe in the room changed.
Started talking about how hard it was for him (obviously). Even my stupid question trying to make fun of his clothes ("What's with the shorts?") got turned around into something interesting and a nice debate started.
Amazing how patience, assertiveness and how interesting he is gets projected through his speech. Made about 30 people fall in love with his thinking and ideas. The "beware guru's advice" was just amazing. The pimp story, incredible. It satisfied our "emotional needs".
What a crude and refreshing reality check at the end, about nobody really being friends in the room and his role to actually make money, over the making friends. An honest, openhearted, sensitive hours of pure gold pieces.
The interaction was great and actually taking time to let the people express themselves in a ordinate way.
I will go through some of Frank's books soon. It's great to pay for something that you believe in.
JUST FOUND KRYPTONITE to keep dangerous gold-digger women away from me. THANK YOU FRANK
-Review by Wolfgang
Montreal, Quebec, Canada
Book Introduction by Leonard Irwin for FrankTalks Articles Volume 3: Monogamy and Non-Monogamy Edition
The first time Frank and I spoke on a coaching call was over 12 years ago (cir 2004).
It wound turn out to be a turning point in my life.
It was the age of the self improvement. With so many to choose from, Frank’s body of work spoke the loudest to me. Transforming himself from a Loser to Seducer was the story I wanted to experience for myself too!
In our first conversation Frank’s tone spoke was in a matter-of-fact, honest, and forth-rightly style. Saying it like it was, and calling me out on things no one had ever said to me.
It was exactly what I wanted at that time in my life!
Frank was the first person in my life to speak honestly with intent to see me get better. Before him, anytime someone tried to point out what was wrong with me I got my back up. With Frank there was never any need to feel defensive. Something about the man immediately put me at ease.
His experiences were something, I could understand. It was like talking to someone who had gotten a copy of your life story. He too had been in those same trenches with me. He came out the other side a better man. Frank shares stories that inspire others because he’d been there too. From those early coaching calls our friendship developed.
When it came time to find someone Frank was there. In the early days of meeting the woman, who eventually became my wife, Frank was there to give me guidance along the way. When problems arose I sought his counsel. He in turned asked questions that cleared my mind to see what I really wanted from a woman.
My wife and I have been together since 2010. I can say that the relationship we have together is directly attributed to those telephone-coaching calls over 12 years ago. Frank has been there over our years together in helping our relationship through some troubled waters. As in any relationship rough times will avail itself. Yet having someone like Frank in your corner guides you to smoother waters.
I highly endorse ANY of Franks works. They are truly life changing!
–Review by Leonard Irwin,
Spiritual Medium and Mental Toughness Coach www.leonardirwin.com
FRANK KERMIT MA
EXPERT RELATIONSHIP COACH
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