Seven Seduction Suggestions For StuttersA well establish part of learning Seduction, and cultivating the skills of a seducer focuses on Verbal skills. The art of storytelling can be a cornerstone for making magic happen for Romance. BUT What if your verbal skills just are not up to par? What if, through no fault of your own, and you have a speech impediment that forbids you from making top use of your potential essential skills for seduction that requires verbiage? We are going to assume, for the purposes of this article, that your stuttering is a physical trait, meaning that speech therapy cannot solve your speech impediment problems. You have a stutter…you are still human. You want affection. You want intimacy. You want to date. You want sex. You want a relationship. Whatever it is you want, if your speech impediments are holding you back this article has some suggestions to help you get a seductive social life going. The following are non-verbal seduction skills that you can start to learn right away and employ when dating. |
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Imagine being the bridge to help people connect with others who, like you, were a little unlucky or challenged with their ability to communicate. This can be hard to imagine for stutters that have been made to apologize for something that is not their fault. This is one way to help stutters combat the emotional stings from any stigmas their stuttering has brought them.
Another reason I recommend this, is that sometimes, the best way to cope and get past our own obstacles, is to focus on connecting with others and possibly helping others with their obstacles.
In fact it is my hope that once you immerse yourself into the sign language community, you might even meet some people who inspire you.
Imagine the effect it could have on your confidence when you meet someone that cannot hear or speak, that has achieved some of their life goals already; it might help you take a new perspective towards your stuttering, and give you the motivation to reach your love goals.
3- Learn To Cook
The ability to prepare a meal for someone you want to get romantic with opens up lots of possibilities.
Does the person you are interested in have any allergies and that is what makes them harder to date? Not for you! You can cook an allergen free meal for them.
Once you learn to cook for yourself, you will be a better option for a board pallet of people with varying tastes. Being able to offer someone a home cooked meal is a very enticing proposition. It also allows you to host that date at home (yours, or theirs), which means the two of you can get more comfortable together, much more quickly than a dinner date in public.
Also, cooking your own food can make the cost of dating a lot less expensive. You do not need to be a great speaker of words to be a great connoisseur of seductive cuisine.
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However, you can start with some recipe books, some online videos, or ask the people you know who can cook to teach you how to make a few choice savory dishes for the different meals of the day.
After all, what starts as a delicious dinner, with mouth-watering desserts, can very likely evolve to breakfast-in-bed the next morning. In that case, best be prepared to satisfy well-earned appetites.
Learning to cook is just one aspect of helping to create a romantic setting, which brings us to the next suggestion.
4-Master The Mood
You may not be able to eloquently recite poetic prose, but you can definitely learn to be exceptionally romantic.
I have an entire Romance Formula to help people that want to grow their romantic chops and it has already helped many people grow that romantic bone in their bodies, where there wasn’t any previously.
Later, you can check out that article here for the Frank Romance Formula.
For right now, start looking at ways to turn your home into the most romantic place you have ever been too.
Romance is all about stimulating the senses, and the easiest way to set yourself up as the most romantic person your dates will ever meet is to use your own home space.
- Is your home decorated in a way to evoke romantic feelings?
- Does the art work in your home display a welcoming energy for sexuality to be expressed and explored?
- Do keep your place smelling good and ready for spontaneous sex? Do you have an appropriately romantic music play list ready to go in your home, so that you do not have to go fiddling at the last minute?
- Do you have an assortment of beverages to offer your dates, and candles for them to light to help enhance the mood?
- Do you put enough attention on your wardrobe so that you present yourself as the most alluring “you” that your date will not be able to help but want to sample?
- Do you take care of BASIC HYGIENE?!? PLEASE!?!?!
Be mindful of things like body odor and bad breath and the smell of your hair.
You would be amazing that the things you think hold you back (like a stutter) are not things actually holding you back, but other things that most people take for granted as common sense.
I have an entire program on how to decorate your bachelor pad, for the purposes of seduction. It goes into great detail how to create a consistent romantic atmosphere, and if this is an area you struggle with, go buy the Pimping Your Pad program.
Do you not have to go to the extremes that the program suggests, but if your home space makes people want to leave, it is going to get in the way of you building a love-life.
A few simple fixes can turn a “let’s just be friends” to “I love hanging out with you and want to get closer”.
5-Learn to Dance
The style of dance is up to you.
If you like fast paced dancing, salsa dancing might be great for you. If you prefer a slower pace, move into ballroom dancing focusing on the waltz, fox trot and tango might be more to your liking.
Find the dance style that best matches your personality.
If you are not sure, take basic classes to learn the beginner steps to them all and see which ones you like best.
I also advise staying away from solo-style dancing…break dancing, belly dancing, pole dancing, etc...are great for exercise, very seductive, and a spectacular show…but that is just it…there is a difference between being in the spotlight and giving your date a show (which could very well turn them on too), and engaging WITH your date, to get your bodies in the habit of moving together gracefully and creating an energy between the two of you.
This is not about sexy and dirty dancing (although it has its charms). This is about learning to dance with a partner, and letting the way the two of you move to the music BE the conversation between the two of you.
- First, dance is a fun way of getting exercise (and you are going to want to get into better shape for the next suggestion).
- Second, dance classes and club/events hyper-focused on the dance experience is a great way to meet new people to potentially date.
- Third and most importantly, it will give you a way to attract and seduce new partners without having to rely on your verbal skills.
Doubt this is possible?
Try going to a wedding after 3 months of basic dance step lessons…and after one song comes on that you can dance appropriately too with the person who agreed to dance with you, you will be followed by many single (and some not so single) people that want to be the next one you choose to take a spin with.
6- Be a Sex God
You do not have to be a great talker to be a great lover.
Learning to be a great lover is all about developing those skills.
This is not about having a porn star body type. This is about finding ways to learn how to touch a body, calibrate to the needs of different lovers, help your date reach orgasm, and to prevent sex from becoming boring.
Sex can quickly become routine if taking it for granted.
This is where you have an opportunity.
If you choose to be enthusiastic and pro-active, you can develop sex skills that will keep someone thinking of you even you are not around them.
There are books like this one, Instructional videos, workshops, and academic texts on learning about sexuality.
It is not just about how to be a better kisser (although that is a great start…put ice cubes in a glass and move them around with your tongue).
You must embark on a journey to learn everything you can about the human body, sexual organs, oral sex and even using sex toys, marital aids and fetishes.
Become the person that can handle the sexuality and sexual curiosities of every date you have, and be prepared to be the only person many of them feels safe enough to explore their fantasies with.
Depending on your particular boundaries and interests, this may also include going to your local BDSM-related workshops and discovering as many different forms of skin stimulation as you can.
Each person has their own combination of what is sexually satisfying, and the more you learn about how to have great sex, the more likely someone is going to give you more opportunities for ongoing sex.
Sex is not just about the knowing the body of your lovers, but it also involves the psychology of sex, and figuring out what can turn them on the most.
You do not need to have verbal skills to be the best lover they ever had. You do have to put in the effort to be attentive and be so knowledgeable about sex organs, sex toys and fetishes that you could give your own little workshop one day.
Leave your judgments behind, step out of your own comfort zone, and get to the point where you can make sure that every person you touch sexually will walk away with a huge smile…assuming they can walk at all once you are done with them.
And finally,
7-Learn the Emotional Needs
An emotional need is what a person has an emotional response to. It has nothing to do with what we THINK we should like and be attracted too.
Ever been attracted to someone that was bad for you? You were responding to an emotional need
Ever knew that you SHOULD date someone that was good for you, but you just did not feel attracted enough? Chances are your own emotional needs were jumbled, or the person unknowingly violated an emotional need of yours.
Learning the emotional needs will prevent you from ending up in the friend-zone, and allow for a person to feel inclined to becoming your lover.
Each person has emotional needs, but each person has a different emotional needs profile (meaning some, or one in particular, will be more important than the others) and it is up to you to address those more important emotional needs of the person for them to feel attraction towards you.
When you learn about your own emotional needs, you learn about your boundaries (or what should be your boundaries) and how to spot red flags, and stay away from people that would bring misery and harm to your life in the long term.
When you learn about the emotional needs of others, you learn what their actual core values are (not what they SAY are their values, but what they are really like behind politically correct masks), and become an excellent judge of character.
Once you know who they are at their core, you will know what makes them have sex and fall in love. Part of what you are going to learn when studying the Emotional Needs Analysis system is how your everyday behaviors and communications help people figure out if they should stay away from you, if they should just be friends with you, if they should have sex with you, or if they should pursue a serious relationship with you.
Love is not random. There is a pattern to creating attraction and studying the Emotional Needs Analysis system is about mastering those patterns.
Learning everything listed above is going to take some time. It may take 3 to 6 months to get most of the basic done on this list. But was is a 6 month investment compared to the quality of your future love life that you will enjoy for the rest of your days? If you go into the far future, and look back at today, I think you will agree that the short term investments are well worth the long term gains.
In Conclusion
I have been in this business for over 20 years, and I have yet to meet ANYONE that is not compensating for something.
Even the people we think have it all together and have it all figured out, have something they suck at, and have to make up for.
Some of the most successful people in the world had to give up on what they REALLY wanted to do with their lives, because they simply did not have what it takes to make it in life, in that way.
The key to happiness is not about obsessing on what you do not have, or what you are unable to do, but in re-focusing on the things you do have going in your favor and learning new skills to open doors that are closed to you at the moment.
You have a future were stuttering does not hold you back from the things you desire. You just have to take a different route to get to the same destination. Happy trails!
-Frank
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