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Think about the last time you were unhappy. How did it affect your conduct? If you’re like most people, it reduces your performance at work and harms your relationships with other people.
In this post, we take a look at some of the things that happen when you feel unhappy.
When You Are Unhappy You Are More Likely To Assume The Worst About Situations
You Start Assuming The Worst
Have you ever felt a lump on your body and then automatically assumed that it is terminal cancer? If so, you’re not alone. You’re in the company of millions of people who are in the habit of assuming that the worst possible thing is happening to them, even if it’s not.
When you are unhappy, you are much more likely to assume the worst. If a friend doesn’t text you back, it’s not because they’re busy, it’s because you’re unworthy and they don’t like you.
Or if you don’t get the job that you wanted, it’s not because it was the wrong role for your skills, it is because you suck as a person.
Unhappy People Will Often Look To Blame Others
You Start Lashing Out
When people are unhappy, they start unconsciously looking for scapegoats they can blame for the way they feel. Because they don’t have pleasantness inside, they begin to attack those around them, finding whatever excuses they can.
“You didn’t do the dishes” or “you’re the reason I feel so bad” are common exclamations for people in this state of mind.
You Start Propping Yourself Up With Things That Are Bad For You
Many people who feel dreadfully unhappy with life will often try to prop themselves up with something that’s bad for them. Sunshine Behavioral Health, a behavioral change clinic, talks about this in detail. Most frequently, people use substances because they produce instant effects in the mind, but many also engage in other dangerous activities. These might include extreme sports, risky sex or crime.
The reason for these activities is that they make people feel normal for a short time. They offer them a welcome break from the misery that they are feeling. However, in the long-term, they are often even more destructive to happiness.
You’re Getting Upset When Things Happen Outside Of Your Control
Unhappy people want to control everything. It’s their way of bringing order to their chaotic minds. They want to make sure that the external world proceeds as pleasantly as possible for them so that they don’t feel disturbed.
Of course, taking this approach to life doesn’t work. That’s because the world has a habit of going its own way. When it does, unhappy people get into deep rages, angry that things have to be the way that they are.
You Beat Yourself Up
Many unhappy people also add insult to injury by beating themselves up for how they feel. They might say things like “I expected I would feel better about my life by the age of 30, but I don’t” or “there is something wrong with me because I can’t be as happy as my friends.”
The problem with misery is that it tends to compound itself, building up, the more you practice it. Eventually, feeling sad becomes a source of self-attack in itself.
Being Unhappy Makes It Hard To Concentrate At Work
Your Work Suffers
It’s hard to get excited about work when you feel unhappy. Everything seems pointless, so it’s hard to put your full effort and concentration into what you’re doing. You know you need money to survive, so you continue plodding forward, but it’s a struggle.
Wrapping Up
Unhappiness is both unpleasant and dangerous. It can lead you to do things that you wouldn’t normally do.
Fortunately, though, you can turn the situation around, often by engaging in simple techniques.
To be happier in your life consider:
- Spending at least 15 minutes per day doing some form of exercise or physical activity that you enjoy
- Go to bed at a reasonable time and give yourself enough rest so that you can take on the challenges of the day
- Spend less time on your own and more time with friends and family
- Go outside more, particularly in the morning and the middle of the day. Take at least 20 minutes to just be in nature. If you are in the middle of a big city, go to a park
- Spend more time helping others. Dedicate around two hours per weekend to charity events, soup kitchens or any other good cause that matters to you