Are you looking to get back with your ex? Consider these 5 points in this contributed post before you take that first step towards getting your ex back.
Some people will claim that there’s never a good reason to get back with your ex. However, there are many couples out there that gone through explosive breakups and got back together again only to grow stronger because of it. Getting back with an ex isn’t always a good decision – you could end up in the exact same situation if you’re not careful about it. Here are the questions you should ask yourself before returning into a relationship with an ex.
Have you given it time?
Many couples blow their second chance by getting together too quickly after breaking up. Straight after a breakup there are likely to be raw feelings of anger, sadness and even jealousy that could cause you to act irrationally. Giving yourself time apart allows you both to assess what it is you really want. If you still miss each other after several months, there’s clearly still a connection and giving it another go could be a good decision.
Have you/can you fix the reason you both broke up?
Every breakup happens for a reason – sometimes it can be a multitude of reasons. Fixing the problem that caused you to break up could be vital if you want to make another go at it. This could involve making improvements to yourself such as quitting a bad habit or making a gesture that proves you’ve changed – you can look at this guide for more information on how to improve yourself and win back your ex. If you can’t fix the problem because it involves making too big a sacrifice, getting back together might not be such a good idea.
Are you both miserable without one another?
This is something you’re unlikely to truly know without talking to one another. You may find that your ex has a new partner or has been putting their passion into achieving goals that they weren’t able to achieve with you – this could be a sign that they’ve happy without you, or it may just be a distraction. If you can’t talk to them yourself, try talking to their friends and see what information you can gather.
Do you have similar goals?
On the topic of goals, it’s important that you both have a few shared aspirations. If one of you wants to move away or have children and the other doesn’t, going back into the relationship may be unwise as one of you won’t be able to achieve your goal. In some cases, you may be able to make compromises. There may be other instances in which one of you has reconsidered their goals. Whatever the case, you shouldn’t give up your dreams for their sake.
Are you willing to take things slowly?
You can’t expect to pick up your relationship as you left off – things will have changed that will need to be addressed. Taking things slowly might allow you to rediscover the feeling of falling in love with one another again. This means going on dates and not seeing each other every day until you both feel comfortable with one another again.
Dr. Laurie Betito Quotes