How do you meet the partner for you? Follow these dating tips to sharpen your aim to find your love match in this contributed post. We don’t often think about it or even acknowledge it because it's just normal. We don’t want to limit our choice of partner so we leave the door open to many possibilities. We go out there onto the dating scene, hoping to find someone that we can be with for the rest of our lives. But stop, don’t you think that’s casting the net our rather wide? You’re just ‘hoping’ to meet someone that you can not only like, but love? Very rarely do relationships last where you are making a choice to cope with someone that you know, deep down you don’t like. Alas, many of us have fickle hearts and we believe or hope that we can change the person more into being like us in the future. That is ridiculous, you can’t change a tiger’s stripes. We need to accept people for who they are and not try to change them just to suit us and our feelings. So how on earth do you find someone that you can love? Well, for a start you should sharpen your aim. Photo Credit: Randy Gon Networking circles from work That old saying of, ‘if you’re single, go ahead and mingle’ is true of many public social gatherings. We always network at work, we need to. Meeting new people from our line of work and talking about things that mean a lot to us professionally is a great way to meet a potential lover. In fact, that’s how most relationships start off. You’re at work and suddenly someone who you considered a colleague or even as part of another company, make your heart race every time you see them. Well, rather than going out on the dating scene, how about start looking for someone who does the same thing as you for a living? You’ll have much more in common immediately and lots to talk about on the first date. The tension is also less because you know what they’re talking about and you can engage with them on a deeper level. Take an interest seriously Those that take their hobby seriously, will end up having to mingle with new people eventually. Especially in sports, if you take it seriously enough you’ll end up wanting better equipment and a better place to play that sport. Take archery for example. If you take it seriously enough, you’ll want to join a club. At this club there will be people who have the exact same interest and have the same issues of improvement and equipment as you do. You’ll end up meeting someone that you would like and want to become more than just friends with. However the tension is already broke because you have been around each other a lot and focus on a joint or shared goal in the sport you play. There are dating websites that are specific in their outreach such as Muslim Dating. Such tools are great for finding people that are into the same thing as you and can narrow down what kind of interests you may have in common. Instead of aiming broadly at a wild forest full of different people, why not just cut to the chase? Look for a potential partner in interests and professions that you yourself have love or like of.
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Finding the one person for you feels amazing! If you are not sure, consider these signs in this contributed post that they are the one for you. We all hope for the feeling of knowing for sure that the person we’re dating is the one. Not all relationships get to this point, but the ones that do can feel amazing. ‘The one’ also means different things to different people. It might mean something different at age 25 than it does at 30. It might not come to you until you reflect on the person you’re with through and through. Of course, thinking someone is the one may not be returned to you, so we’re often hesitant to apply that label until we’re absolutely sure. Just like any matter of faith, instinct will often lead you to the right answer. There is no shame in falling in love with someone multiple times during your relationship, in fact this shows that life with this person could be truly novel! It may not be long before you’re comparing metal or silicone wedding rings, and walking over the threshold of your home as newlyweds. Until then, consider these signs they are the one for you: Trust If you can trust your partner, you have one of the vital pillars of a strong relationship already constructed. Without this, nothing else functions. You need to trust your partner to be true to you, to keep you aware, and to help you become your best self. In return, you must do the exact same for them. However, trust is not only found in the ways we imagine. For example, trusting a partner could be knowing they can speak to you authentically, that they will not filter their words around you. This could mean telling you when you’re acting out of line, or when they’re worried about you. Just as you expect a close friend to be candid with you, a lover will find a manner to build you up from your flaws, and to help you see them yourself rather than constantly remind you of them. If you trust in your partner 100%, perhaps more than you do yourself, they might just be ‘the one’ material. Responsibility If you can trust them to be responsible with their affairs, and to stand on their own two feet, and to put as much into the relationship as you do, and to keep building a life together with that as their main priority, then it could be that ‘the one’ is within your grasp. We often idealize love with spontanaeity, and for good reason. But sometimes, a little responsibility can help ease us, and know that this is the person we wish to build our life with. Fresh While deep, burning and passionate love can be sustained for long periods of time, it does take work to do. What matters is that this person feels fresh whenever you see them, even after years. If you still get butterflies, if you still wish to impress one anohter with surprises, or if you find yourself trying to be the best you can for the sake of both of you and you’re sure they’re doing the same, you may have just found the one, With these mature and sensible yet loving tips, you may identify the one sooner rather than later. Are you shy and don't feel comfortable dating? Read this contributed post which has 4 dating tips for shy guys who want to overcome their dating anxiety. There’s a common misconception that being shy has to get in the way of and ruin your dating life when that isn’t the case. Being shy doesn’t have to impact your dating success or be seen as a bad thing - we each have our own, very unique personalities and if being shy is part of yours, you need to learn to make it work for you. Perhaps you don’t know how to talk to people who you’re attracted to? Maybe you’ve tried to make a relationship work in the past while hiding your feelings and it’s all ended in one big mess? What it’s important to remember is that your shyness is not your whole identity, it’s just one part of who you are as a person. The good news is that if you take note of the tips below, you can make dating that little bit easier (and more enjoyable) for yourself. Understand that just because you’re attracted to someone that doesn’t mean they’re not a normal person Regardless of how attractive someone is, they are just normal people. That’s the thing to remember because there’s no need to be shy when talking to just another person, is there? Picture this, you’re in a supermarket, you see someone cute in the aisle but are lost for words about how to introduce yourself, but when you’re at the counter with the cashier you’re happy to chat away. These two people are no different from each other - that’s what you need to understand. Make friends who are extroverts You’re an introvert and that’s cool but make friends with people who are extroverts. Studies have shown that it’s easier to relax when you’re around louder people who like to be the centre of attention because that takes the pressure off of you. You’ll find chatting with people that you’re attracted to, far easier in this kind of setting. Date online To build confidence in yourself, spend some time online dating and using services like https://www.guyspyvoice.com/phone-free-trial/gay-male-chat-coverage to meet people. Dating can be daunting but the more people you chat to, either online or over the phone, the more your confidence should grow. As your confidence grows, you should start to feel less shy when it comes to talking to people who you’re attracted to. Let go of the bad If you've had bad dating experiences in the past, you need to stop holding onto them and let them go. If you don’t let go of the bad experiences that you’ve had, they will haunt your dating life forever and make you shyer than you were before. It’s important to realise that everyone has bad dating experiences but that they don’t have to define your future of dating. When you’re a shy guy, dating is not always an easy task, but if you take note of the tips above and implement them in how you date, you can make landing yourself a partner a slightly easier task. Inject some excitement into your relationship with these 7 tips to great date nights. Read this contributed post to find out more. Being in a committed long-term relationship is one of the greatest things in the world. However, the natural spark of romance will inevitably fade over time, which can make date nights feel a little stale. Fear not; it is possible to inject the excitement back into those dates. Follow these seven pointers below, and those future dates will be even more breathtaking than when you first dated. Break Away From The Norm The reason that many of your dates as a long-term couple feel stale is that everything feels too similar to normal life. Learn to switch things up, and the dates will become fresh and exciting once more. This needn’t be a difficult challenge. Renting a car from RYDE for the day or weekend can turn a cruise around the city into a luxury experience for both of you. Alternatively, staying at a local hotel can work wonders without taking on the costs or time of taking a holiday abroad. Even something as simple as having one of you turn up to ‘collect’ your date from home can change the mindset. Embrace it. Do Something That Makes The Future Look Exciting When you first start dating, the thoughts of what may await in the future is enough to give you butterflies. You needn’t lose those sentiments just because you’re in a long-term relationship. You just need to look for alternatives. You needn’t be engaged to know that your relationship is heading towards marriage. It may seem a little odd, but a day of looking at potential wedding venues can be a lot of fun even if the big event isn’t on the horizon for some time. Aside from the excitement, it shows that you are both still committed to each other for the long haul. Or Reconnect With The Past Alternatively, you can do the complete opposite by traveling back to the start of your relationship. Reliving the first date is undoubtedly one of the best ways to recapture that early dating magic. The excitement will return in an instant. Recreate the photographs you took on that do to see how far you’ve come as a couple. Honestly, that’s one of the most exciting things of all, and should be cherished by both of you. Be Spontaneous The harsh reality of life is that you probably have more responsibilities today than you did when you first started dating. You have careers, a home, and potentially children to consider. So, date nights are a commitment that may need to be planned. Once they start, though, you can let the spontaneity flow. Create a list of date ideas and pick one at random. It might be great; it might be a washout. Either way, it’ll be memorable while giving you a chance to have fun and celebrate your love. Start A Joint Hobby Hobbies play an incredibly important role in our lives. While having something to enjoy with friends is great, a regular activity with your partner is a great way to keep the romance alive. Not least if you choose dance classes or something that can actively aid your sexual attraction. This is better than a one-off date too as it is a continued commitment to each other. You’ll have a date night every week and won’t need to break the bank for it. Face Your Fears Facing your fears is a lot easier when you have a supportive partner by your side. So, heading off on special adventures can be a great option for your next date day. If nothing else, it’s a cheat to help get your heartbeats racing. Theme parks are among the best options, not least because there are so many other things to see and soak in. Disney World tickets can be bought online at a cheaper rate than on the day while it’ll save you lining up. This is the type of date that will last in your memories forever. Alternatively, real adrenaline junkies can try to organize a tandem parachute jump or bungee. For a few moments of a fear, you’ll gain a lifelong memory. Go To A Show Special events like sporting events or music gigs are a great way to embrace the energy of a crowd to inject magic into your life. You’ll also want to look nice without feeling the need to be as formal as you would at a restaurant. When attending gigs, there are two great options. Either book tickets for an artist you love and that plays songs with sentimental value, or go to the local open mic night. This can be great fun while the sense of not knowing what you’ll hear makes it fresh and exciting too. Ultimately, if you do something you love with the person you love, date nights will remain fun and exciting. Tips for Your Dating Criteria Checklist by Frank Kermit When coaching someone that wants to STOP BEING SINGLE, it is important to examine that person's dating criteria. Sometimes, the reason that someone is forever stuck being single is the criteria itself. Here are some tips to make sure that your criteria is not holding you back: 1-Criteria that is Firm If you are firm in your criteria that you will not waiver on, then right or wrong, you should be explicit in expressing your criteria. This means if you are online dating, make sure your criteria is in your online dating profile. If you are discussing setting up a first date, express your criteria before you actually meet, so that you do not waste your time, or the time of the other person. Note: You will always have to screen and filter when dating. Even if you make your criteria clear, it does not always stop people from wanting you to give them a chance. 2-Is the Criteria Relevant? Next would be to explore if your criteria is actually relevant. Is it a matter of initial attraction? Lust? Is it relevant to a long term life plan? To help you figure out if your criteria is actually relevant; ask the question: Under what circumstances would that criteria not be important (if any)? If the criteria would not matter under a number of circumstances, then it is not a relevant criteria. 3-Is the Criteria Counter-Productive? Would her having such criteria turn off your potential target audience? Some people will be offended to your "fetish". For example, the members of the amputee community want relationships like any other people, but some resent being with a partner that has an amputee fetish. Would your criteria potentially turn off the very people that embody that criteria? Then you need to be ready to face a little more rejection in the process of dating until you find someone that appreciates your interests. 4-Is the Criteria Hypocritical? Do you get resentful if you get rejected when someone uses the same kind of criteria against you? If so, you need to rethink your criteria, because being a hypocrite can get in the way of your finding love when dating. For example, if you reject someone because they make less money than you, would you be upset if someone rejects you because you make less money than them? If you reject someone for their body type, would you be upset if someone rejected you because of your body type? If so, the best way to attract more open minded folks is to be more open minded. (You would be amazed how offended some people get in coaching when confronted about their hypocrisy) 5-Is the Criteria Reciprocal? Just because you have an ideal partner in mind, that does not mean that the person you seek, is seeking you. One of the hardest questions a coaching client must face, is if you are "worthy" of the affection of the person you are seeking. So, ask yourself if your ideal partner would be attracted to you. If the answer is "No", then it may be time to re-evaluate your goals in the next coaching session. 6-Is Your Criteria Demographic Realistic? Based, on your collective criteria, is there enough of a demographic for you to actually find someone to be with? When you put all your criteria together, does the composite person you are seeking even exist? Is there a large enough pool of candidates for you to date from? If not, get real. Get very real, very fast, or the only thing that you will guarantee is that you will continue to be single. Lets use a fun example: Let's say you have the criteria that you will ONLY date: -a working architect -currently living in your small town (you refuse to move and you refuse to engage in a long distance relationship) and then we do analysis of that demographic and find out: -there are only 3 architects in your small town, -one is retired (so not currently working) -one is married (not available) -one is of a sexual orientation that would not be attracted to you then your criteria for what is out there would not be realistic, and we can predict that you will continue to be single 7-Is Your Criteria Just An Excuse? And finally is this criteria actually a means to make it impossible for you to find someone? Some people have fears of intimacy that mask themselves as ridiculous criteria. Could this be your case here? It is easier to be thought of as "too picky" instead of "incapable of a relationship." When your criteria list is more vast than your list of skills that represent your ability to attract a partner, that is often a sign of some kind of fear of intimacy. It could be a fear of emotional intimacy, being vulnerable, a fear of physical sex, or even the fear of the responsibility that comes with getting romantically involved with others. If you are using your criteria as a means to keep people away, then definitely sign up for an hour of Coaching to see what Frank can do for you. Relationships are not a race! Read this contributed post to see if you doing things that might mean you are rushing yours. When you think you’ve found the right person for your heart, your soulmate, it seems foolish to waste any more time. Indeed, when you are sure in your heart that you love your partner, you know that you need to act fast to move your relationship to the next level. Right? Well, in reality, you want to be cautious. Going too fast could be damaging for your couple. Of course, it’s a good thing to be enthusiastic about your relationship. But you need to make sure that you’re not rushing things faster than they should go. Both partners need time to establish themselves in a relationship, so that if you choose to speed up things too abruptly, your partner might feel like you’re stepping on their toes. While there’s no saying how fast is too fast, there are certain signs that can help you to adjust your pace to your partner’s. Meeting is not the same than getting to know someone Love at first sight is an aberration. Of course, you might meet someone you find interesting, but it’s impossible to know them and appreciate them for who they are when you’ve just met. The same argument is valid for online dating tools, such as Grindr for PC and Mac. Take the time to get to know someone before you allow yourself to think you’re in love. The process of understanding someone takes time and effort, but it is worth every second of it. As you do, you can get to grow your feelings for each other and create new memories. In short, if you fall in love at first sight, you are already going to fast! How long before you should pop the question? Relationships take work all the time. While it doesn’t mean it’s hard work, it would also be a mistake to take your couple for granted. But as you work to make your couple grow, you might come to realize that you want the spend the rest of your life with that person. You want the house, the children and the pet that goes with it. You are ready for the full package. There is no right or wrong as to when you should pop the question, but you need to make sure your partner is on the same page. In other words, it doesn’t help to plan an engagement proposal if you haven’t had a serious conversation about your future first. Are you actually going to hurt yourself? Are you so exciting about your relationship that you may not notice that you’re acting a little over the top? For instance, if you find yourself celebrating weekly anniversaries, then you might put your partner in an awkward position. OTT romantic gestures can be risky at the beginning of your relationship, especially as it can be used as a manipulation tool by an unscrupulous partner. Additionally, if your relationship isolates you from your circle of friends and relatives, it’s time to slow down and try to make it work in the real world. In conclusion, the secret to a happy relationship is to go steady instead of fast. Taking the time to know and understand each other without creating overly romantic settings from Day One is the secret of making it work in the long term. Would you like to learn how to take your relationship from dating to something more serious? The 5 steps explored in this contributed post may help you with that. Relationships take work. We all know that. Men and women are so different, that when you’re trying to make a relationship work, you know that you’re going to have to compromise. By now, you should also know that trust, honesty, and communication, are all important too. But when you’ve fallen in love, you’re able to get that right, and you feel as if you’ve found someone that you can make a life with, you may be ready to move forward. If you want marriage, children, and everything that goes along with it, do you know how to get it? Do you know how you’re going to take that leap from dating to something more serious? Here are five steps that will help you to do that. 1. Make Sure You’re On The Same Page Before you jump in with the idea of moving forward, you’re going to want to make sure that you’re both thinking along the same lines. Because you may be ready to make the next step, but she might not be thinking the same. So don’t just assume. Make sure that you have that conversation. Be sure to be frank and stay how you feel and what your intentions are. When you know that you’re both on the same page, then point two is a great next step for you both. 2. Move In Together If you’re not already living together, then this is often a good first step. You’d be surprised by how many couples think that they’re perfect for each other. But when they live together, they realize that they go that so wrong! So make sure that you spend some time living together and getting to know each other's habits and quirks before you make a more permanent commitment. Although you should be able to work through any issue, that isn’t always the case when you know you’re not meant to be. 3. Plan The Engagement When you’re happy that things are going well, and you still feel the same way after months of living together, it’s time to plan your proposal. Take an idea from something like https://www.shutterfly.com/ideas/proposal-ideas/ if you need inspiration. Just make sure that your engagement plans are suitable for you as a couple and will be something she loves. 4. Shop For The Diamond This is something that you can do before the proposal, or after. Find a jeweler or diamond supplier, such as https://diamondexpert.com/blue-nile-review/, that you think will create the perfect ring. She will wear this forever, so this step is always crucial. 5. Start The Wedding Preparations And finally, now that she’s accepted and you’ve put a ring on it, then you’re going to want to start thinking about planning the wedding. This is something that she might want to take full control of. Because a lot of women have dreamt about their weddings days for a long time. And if you’re impartial to what happens on the day - let her do what she likes. Whether you plan this for a year, less, or more, just make sure that it’s right. There’s no need to rush, because now you’re already moving forward and you know you’ll spend the rest of your lives together. Blind Dates don't have to be a nerve racking experience. Enjoy the moment by utilizing some of these top tips for a successful blind date as you read this contributed post. If you are going on a blind date, you may be feeling nervous and anxious about the experience. What should you talk about? What if there are any awkward silences? What if you are not attracted to the other person? These are just a few of the questions that may be going through your mind. But there is no need to worry; simply read on to discover some top tips for a successful blind date.
Use a matchmaking service – There is only one place to begin, and this is by using a matchmaking service to suit you up with your date. You can find out more information about this here: https://macbeth-matchmaking.com/dating/professional-dating/. Why should you use such a service? Well, you do not want to go on a blind date with just anyone. If you do, then all of the worries mentioned in the introduction may come to life. However, with a matchmaking service, you can be certain that you are going to be going on a blind date with someone you are compatible with. Leave your insecurities at home – You need to bring the most confident version of yourself to the table. Leave your insecurities at home. It does not matter if your date isn’t into you; we were not put on this planet to be attracted to everyone that we meet. Throw out your expectations – One of the biggest problems when it comes to blind dates is that people go in there with expectations. There is no quicker way to kill your date then to conjure up an image of what the other person is going to be like. If they do not match this image, you end up ruling him or her out without giving them a chance. Prepare some questions – Think of some questions in advance that you can ask if it goes a bit quiet. Of course, you do not want it to sound like you are interviewing the person, and stay away from boring questions like what is their favorite color. Instead, why not ask what they would do if they won the lottery. Wear something you are comfortable in – Yes, it is important to dress to impress. Nevertheless, you need to make sure you are comfortable. If you are not, it will show. You can find advice on what to wear on a date here: https://uk.match.com/pages/advice/dating-advice/dating-advice-women/dating-tips-how-dress-date/. Yes, those high heels may look amazing, but they don’t look good if you appear like you are going to topple over with every step that you take. Hopefully, you now feel more prepared for your blind date. If you follow the advice that has been provided above, you can make sure that everything goes as smoothly as possible. From being the real you to ensuring you fix up a date with someone you are going to be compatible with, follow the steps above with care.
The Question: How do I know if he likes me? (He asked me what my weekend plans were, but didn’t ask me out. By the way I said "no plans yet...") -No Date Yet Frank Advice Answer:
Dear No Date Yet, Given the current climate in society right now, he likely wants to ask you out, but is worried that you will be offended in some way. Did you communicate to him that you wanted him to ask you out? If you do want to go on a date with him, you could have said: “I have no plans. If you're free too, do you want to get together?” Did you ask him if he had plans this weekend? That would have shown him that you are interested in knowing his availability to date. It sounds like he may like you, but he wants more of a sign that you would be open to being asked out. We are at a time where the #MeToo movement is changing the way people interact with each other. Do NOT expect him to chase you! Do NOT make him have to jump through hoops to pursue you! If you do that, you will only attract the jerks who want the challenge of the "conquest", and you will be pushing away the good men who avoid women who play games. After years of coaching so many men, it is very clear that most men will NOT ask out a woman unless she gives a clear sign that she is interested AND will say yes. For the women who wish to take charge of their dating life and embrace change. Right now you can purchase the workbook for women. "I'M A WOMAN, IT'S MY TIME" -Frank, because I have to be |
In my book “Mastering The Emotional Needs of Men: Ally vs. Enemy” I teach that one of the Emotional Needs of men is Masculine Identity. This is how each individual man defines his own masculinity. An Emotional Need is what a person emotionally responds to, NOT what they think. |
This means that while a man might intellectually understand that he is more than just his hair, his emotional reaction can cause him to withdraw or lose his sense of confidence from hair loss.
For many men, having hair is part of their Masculine Identity Emotional Need.
When Monty had hair he never cared what people thought about him. He was confident, arrogant, willing to make the first move, and loved to pursue women. He was envied by men, and sought after by women. He was sure of his Masculine Identity.
After his hair loss, Monty felt like he didn’t know himself anymore.
He became afraid, as he was convinced that people were looking at him, talking about him, and laughing at him. He could hardly bring himself to leave his home because of his fears. He felt that he had lost his Masculine Identity with the loss of his hair.
Now let’s go back to your story. How does this relate to YOU? You are attracted to Suzie and would like her to go out on a coffee date with you, but fear your genetic predisposition to male pattern baldness or total hair loss will keep you out of the running.
THE TRUTH IS THIS:
It was not Monty's hair loss that caused him to lack confidence, just like it is not about your receding hairline that is stopping you from asking Suzie out.
It does not matter that Monty had a reputation for being a “ladies man” and the experience to back it up.
It does not matter what you have going for you.
If you have a hard time accepting yourself, it will be even harder for you to put yourself out there and risk rejection, when you express your interest in someone who might not want you back.
Women Who Reject Balding Men
Are there women who find balding men less attractive?
Yes.
There are also women who say that bald men are sexy.
There are studies that show that some women prefer balding men, and other studies that show that women love a man with a full head of hair. Many of these studies are tied into selling products, so buyers beware.
No matter what the issue is: whether it is baldness, height, weight, finances, etc. there will be women who love it, women who are not bothered either way as long as their other criteria are met (sense of humour, honesty etc.), and there are women who will hate it to the point where no matter what else you have going for you, it will never be enough to compensate for what you are “lacking” in their eyes.
In my program, “The Art of Calibration Program: From Creepy To Charisma” I discuss this concept and assign a percentage to make it easier to understand. So now to explain further, we will examine the topic of hair loss in men and apply randomly chosen percentages of 15%, 70% and 15%. |
For the 15% of women out there who love bald or balding men:
There is nothing for you to worry about. These women are ready to love you for the way you look right now. Be enthusiastic to meet them, and when you do focus on addressing her Emotional Needs.
At the same time, you will be challenging her to address your Emotional Needs as a man.
The women that already were attracted to Monty loved him for being Monty (not because of his hair) and would have continued to want him if Monty had only continued to purse them.
Just like if Suzie already likes you, then all you have to do is make your move and ask her out.
For the 70% of women who are neutral about bald or balding men:
This is the group that you can influence the most.
They will look to you to set the example of how you want to be treated.
If you fully accept yourself and you ACT like your hair condition (whatever it may be) is not an issue for you, they will follow your example, and not make it an issue for them.
If however you do not fully accept yourself, and act like your hair loss is a big issue, they will also react to you as if it were a big issue.
Monty would have lost this group and it would not have been because they cared about his hair. Monty let his hair loss affect him so much, it was to the the point that he was no longer open to female attention, and the women picked up on that message.
That is why he would have lost this group.
Just like YOU who are too preoccupied with your thinning hairline!
Suzie is going to sense that you are not really present with her, and she is going to feel (your lack of being present) enough not to go on a date with you, if you ask her.
For the 15% of women who already dislike bald or balding men:
Your best bet with this group is to cut your losses and move on.
The person Monty was before his hair loss never cared what this group of women thought because he was too focused on having fun with the 85% (15% plus 75%) of women out there (the majority) that either already liked him, or that he could influence into liking him for a date!
He didn’t care about the women that would never accept him, until he reached a crisis moment in his life where HE stopped accepting himself.
If Suzie (or any other woman) really hates bald or balding men balding, then it is best to find out as soon as possible. Move on to someone who either loves it, or is neutral about it.
Never is the real issue hair loss, or going bald, or considering yourself to be the newest member of the follically challenged community.
The issue is NOT your hair loss.
The issue is how you deal with it that matters.
Dealing With Going Bald
The Franktalks.com coaching philosophy is this:
IF THERE IS SOMETHING ABOUT YOURSELF
THAT YOU DO NOT LIKE
YOU MUST OWN IT
To OWN it, means to either:
A) Accept it as part of who you are. If it is not going to change, work around it as best you can and do what you want to do with as little compromise as possible
or
B) Do something directly about it to change it.
A) Accepting Hair Loss
Accepting hair loss comes in different forms:
For some men accepting hair loss means learning to be okay with it, accepting the fact that some women will have a problem with it, and being okay with that.
For some men, accepting hair loss means they shave their heads and feel they are taking an assertive step towards the situation, rather than let the hair loss and possibly eventual balding happen on it's own.
For some men, accepting hair loss means never letting it stop them from doing the things they would have done if they had the hair.
Hair loss is an opportunity to self-actualize (self reflection) of what going bald means to you.
If hair loss or going bald means that you see yourself as no longer young, virile, or adept at attracting women, it will influence the way you feel about yourself, likely in a negative way.
The way you feel about yourself is a key element in the world of attracting a partner.
If hair loss or going bald holds a different meaning for you such as:
*The privilege of growing older (When you appreciate your age as you begin to attend funerals of those close to your age)
*A sign of wisdom that comes with maturity
*You just don’t have to care anymore what other people think about anything you do.
It will influence the way you feel about yourself, most likely in a very positive way.
The way you feel about yourself is a key element in the world of attracting a partner.
Acceptance:
Being okay with something by not letting it turn into a problem that hinders you from doing the things you want to do with your life.
By accepting you find a way to get your needs met, even if you cannot have everything you want.
It has nothing to do with giving up.
B) Making Some Changes
If you have accepted that this is your situation, and instead of working around it, you want to try to change your situation, the next step is to look at the options available to you.
This requires research and some experimenting to find what works for you. Just as not every person can follow the same diet plan, not every person will want to follow the same hair loss solution.
There are many causes of hair loss, and one possible cause is stress. If you feel that your hair loss is from stress, it may be time to re-evaluate your lifestyle and seek ways to make it less stressful.
This might mean some sacrifices that you did not anticipate making.
For example: It might mean a change of employment for you to something less stressful, but that also might mean a drastic pay cut. Looking at hair loss causes is just one step in the process. This is one possible solution if you are suffering hair loss from stress.
Next, have a look at other solutions that may work for you. Some men opt to wear a wig, an artificial hair piece (toupee), or other methods.
When it comes right down to it, the opinions of others do not matter (including the opinion of this author). What matters is that YOU are comfortable with the solution you seek, and you are comfortable with the risks of being exposed if you keep some of these methods a secret.
Currently there is no cure for baldness (at least none that I know of, and if someone reading this article has knowledge of such, please leave a comment to share that knowledge with men who may want it.)
Knowledge Is Power
Do NOT be in denial of what is happening to you.
Denial instead of acceptance tends to lead to poor choices. Denial of any issue that is affecting a man's emotional well being will cause him to make questionable decisions in many areas of his life, including what to do about hair loss.
An example:
A man works a job in an area of industry that is declining. He is in denial about the longevity of his employment. He decides to increase his expenses and in turn acquires debt. Contrast this with another man who also works a job in an area of industry that is declining, but who has accepted the truth of his situation. He wisely curbs his spending while seeking out knowledge on alternative sources of income.
Your inability to cope with your hair loss will result in your eventual violation of a woman’s Emotional Needs.
Why?
The longer you date the same woman, the more she will get to know the real you. At that point, the truth will be harder to deny.
The truth about your hair loss is sure to come up and she will be concerned that you kept the truth from her. This may make her wonder what else you are not telling her.
The issue is trust not hair loss.
How To Make Balding Look Good
If you are in the position where you are in the process of balding, whether you have vertex baldness, a receding hairline, or you are anticipating hair loss and want to take proactive self-care steps,
there is nothing wrong with seeking out some advice on the subject.
Hair loss and confidence are tied together for many men who see it as part of their Masculine Identity emotional need.
True confidence develops as a result of the actions you take.
If your appearance is what you are worried about
(and you consider your hair to be part of your appearance)
then take action!
Put work into your overall appearance.
Look your best and carry yourself in a way
that displays your pride.
There have been studies done on men’s online dating profile photos. The studies found that the photos of men, which received the MOST likes, were the photos in which the men expressed PRIDE in their faces.
The facial expression of feeling proud was interpreted as CONFIDENCE.
For over 15 years I have coached men about dating and relationships. In that time the message that I have received over and over again is that men really do not feel they should ask for help. It is part of many male cultures to be an independent achiever. What we as men must remember is that even the most accomplished men have a team of coaches, mentors and advisers. |
Clients who have taken action and asked for help have achieved great success in their lives. In 90 days Adult Male Virgins who were never able to admit they even had problems with sex and dating, found themselves with multiple girlfriends! They found confidence through their actions. They developed pride in their appearance (and yes many of these men did have hair loss concerns). |
If YOU are embarrassed about your thinning hair, don’t be.
Take action! Ignoring what is happening to your hair, and being in denial does not help you in the long term.
The worse thing you can do is try to hide your concerns,
and end up trying untested methods
which could harm your remaining hair,
and possibly your health.
Accept your hair loss situation.
Own it.
Love yourself regardless of it.
Be PROUD of your appearance as it is,
and know that you can do something about it
if you want to change it.
Seek out some those who can help you
to keep your confidence up.
Remember Monty?
It took a little longer than expected, but with the proper coaching and guidance Monty was willing to go out in public again.
Eventually he remembered everything that he still had going for him before he lost all of his hair. Monty took action and found the pride in himself that he had lost.
He even went back to his playboy lifestyle for a time until he met a woman he really adored. The married and today they have a family together.
Monty now plans to teach his son everything he learned.
Now back to YOU.
Do you want to take action?
Find your PRIDE and CONFIDENCE.
Work on what is holding you back
and find the confidence to ask out your "Suzie"
@wearehims @emotionalneeds #hairloss #hairlosstraining #hairlossproblem #hairlossproblems #hairlossexpert #hairlosstattoo #HairlossAutority #hairlosscontrol #hairlossremedy #hairlosssalon #hairlossconsultation #HairlossPreShampoo #hairlosscourse #hairlossremedies #hairlossspecialist #hairlosstherapy #hairlossproducts #hairlosscoverup #hairlossshampoo #hairlosssollution #hairlosstreatment #hairlossfrommedication #HairLossForMen #hairlossclinic #hairlosssoultion #hairlossolotion #hairlosscover #hairlossinwomen #hairlossprevention #hairlossanswers #BaldGuyWithNoWorries #baldchick #baldboys #baldnesssolution #baldie #balding #baldisbeautiful #baldinghelp #baldingteens #baldingsolutions #baldingsolution #baldisbadass #bald #nohair #nohairdontcare #scalpmicropigmentation
Sign up for coaching TODAY and let's get you to the point where even Monty would envy you.
-Frank Kermit
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