Are You Relating, or Understanding?
By Carrie Campbell of www.BrianAndCarrie.com
Brian and I are often asked...
"What is the one thing that is important to have a quality relationship with your spouse?"
Truth be told there are many things but if I had to pick just one I would simply say this...
STOP trying to RELATE to your partner and START trying to UNDERSTAND them.
You see the world through your perceptions, interpretation and assumptions which means you are not always going to be able to relate to your partner.
Brian needs quiet to write, whereas I couldn't care if a mac truck was going though the house.
Brian needs to avoid eye contact when deep in conversation to focus on the words, I need to see him to talk to him.
We feel differently.
We think differently.
We process differently.
We retain information differently.
You spend so much time unconsciously trying to get your partner to be more like you
that you don't fully appreciate that they are not... nor will they ever be YOU.
Because we are different.
I don't need to relate to who Brian is... I have to understand him.
This mere concept has change the lives of countless couples
who have come through our mentor programs... as if a light as turned on.
So... Are you trying to UNDERSTAND or RELATE?
Carrie Campbell of www.BrianAndCarrie.com